Gimme A Sign: In Other Words

Gimme a sign
Blah, blah, blah...

Since finally discovering the serenitude of the Los Angeles River’s east bank south of Fletcher Drive last month, practically every time I’ve biked it since I’ve marveled at the chuckleworthy overwrought signage in the center of the pic at right (readably biggifiable when clicked), that smacks of having been crafted and finalized by a thinktank of city-contracted attorneys sequestered in a windowless sub-basement chamber deep below City Hall who felt that the discouragement of hanging out along the river with intent to hang out some more required much, much more than just a NO LOITERING sign.

Seriously: “kinder a fire?” And after that, what’s with the nonsensical “wash and cloth or bedding…”

I’m fascinated by the conceit that any transient would bother to read the entire screed, much less move on in abject law-abiding obedience.

Of course,  what would double the hoot would be if the entirely and appropriately to-the-point “NO DOGS OFF LEASH” sign to its right were similarly over-worded, like so:

LAMC SEC. 53.06.2 DOGS – RIVER BED:   No person shall, stand, sit, walk, lollygag, hustle, hop, skip, jump, amble, meander, flit, run, jog, trot, sprint, traverse, canter, drag, tumble, gallop, haul, boogie, truck, prance, tip-toe, or otherwise move forward, backward, sideways, or at any angle and at any speed, with a canine (heretofore referred to as “dog”) of any size, height, width, age, color, sex, pure or mixed breed, disposition and demeanor, without a leash attached to the dog and held securely by the aforementioned person while traversing the official bed of the Los Angeles River.

One thought on “Gimme A Sign: In Other Words”

  1. Ha ha ha!! Gawd. That is laughable, alright. I’ve always laughed at the “Dogs on Leash” sign that they all chose…. the dog is very detailed silhouette but the person is a stick person. As a graphic artist, it has always made me laugh.

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