On the Origins of Parking Tard-ism

Parking Douchebag
The most important person in the lot.

Ever see that guy parked perfectly straddling the line between two parking spots? If you’ve been reading this blog for much time at all, I suspect you have. Our own Matt Mason pondered whether a guy still in his car who drove off after being photographed constituted a parking d’bag (a more PC term).

Today my lunch companion was that guy. When we arrived at lunchtime in the cramped lot in Chatsworth, there were large vehicles on either side of the two spaces he straddled, and so when he slid right up between those vehicles it nearly looked like a normal, acceptable parking job. But we knew better, and in spite of my protests the Buick remained firmly put, straddling the lines like the best of ’em.

I’m a firm believer that it doesn’t matter how people were parked when you got there: don’t straddle the lines. Especially because then you come out after eating lunch and it’s clear to everyone that you really don’t care about anyone but yourself. Can I get an amen?

5 Replies to “On the Origins of Parking Tard-ism”

  1. Disagree. If the only possible parking spot is an offset spot because someone else parked badly, using that spot is fine.

    1. Its quite apparent in the photo that there were other spots available and since when is a Big ass buick LeSabre a compact car anyway?

    2. Fair enough, Ben – but we still reserve the right to point and laugh :-p

      There were others spots available when we pulled in, but not nearly as many as when we came out, and none as convenient. Because, you know, it would’ve been a major inconvenience to add an extra ~25 yards to our walk!

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