Guess What We’ve Got Tickets To?

FRIDAY APRIL 16: Jay-Z, LCD Soundsystem, Them Crooked Vultures, Vampire Weekend, Deadmau5, Public Image Limited, The Specials, Grizzly Bear, Passion Pit, Echo and the Bunnymen, Benny Benassi, Fever Ray, Grace Jones, She & Him, Erol Alkan, The Avett Brothers, Calle 13, The Whitest Boy Alive, The Cribs, La Roux, Yeasayer, Lucero, DJ Lance Rock, The Dillinger Escape Plan, Proxy, Ra Ra Riot, Deer Tick, Wolfgang Gartner, Aeroplane, Iglu & Hartly, Sleigh Bells, P.O.S., Baroness, Hockey, Little Dragon, White Rabbits, Wale, Kate Miller-Heidke, As Tall as Lions, Jets Overhead, Alana Grace, Pablo Hassan.

SATURDAY, APRIL 17: Muse, Faith No More, Tiësto, MGMT, David Guetta, The Dead Weather, Hot Chip, Devo, Coheed and Cambria, Kaskade, 2Many DJ’s, Major Lazer, Dirty Projectors, Gossip, Z-Trip, The xx, John Waters, Les Claypool, The Raveonettes, Mew, Sia, Camera Obscura, Tokyo Police Club, Porcupine Tree, Old Crow Medicine Show, Aterciopalados, Bassnectar, Frightened Rabbit, Dirty South, Flying Lotus, Corinne Bailey Rae, Pretty Lights, Shooter Jennings, RX Bandits, The Almighty Defenders, Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros, Craze & Klever, Zoe, The Temper Trap, Portugal. The Man, Band of Skulls, Girls, Beach House, Steel Train, Frank Turner.

SUNDAY, APRIL 18: Gorillaz, Pavement, Thom Yorke????, Phoenix, Orbital, Spoon, Sly and the Family Stone, De La Soul, Julian Casablancas, Plastikman, Gary Numan, Charlotte Gainsbourg, Sunny Day Real Estate, Yo La Tengo, MUTEMATH, Deerhunter, Infected Mushroom, Club 75, Matt & Kim, The Big Pink, Gil Scott-Heron, King Khan and the Shrines, Florence and the Machine, Yann Tiersen, Little Boots, Miike Snow, Talvin Singh, Ceu, B.o.B., Babasonicos, Owen Pallett, The Glitch Mob, Mayer Hawthorne, Local Natives, Rusko, The Middle East, Hadouken!, The Soft Pack, Kevin Devine, Paparazzi, Delphic, One EskimO.

Yeah. So. Wanna go to Coachella? Goldenvoice has given me a pair of tickets to give away to one lucky winner. They’re good for the whole three-day festival. To win, you must marshal all the social media at your command & tell your friends to come here to this post & leave a comment, begging, demanding, or crafting an elaborate sob story commanding my attention. They can cut a video & leave me a youtube link; link to their blog post telling me how your therapist thinks you should get tickets for your mental health; draw me a picture & post it to flickr. They have an incentive, of course, because then you might take them with you. I won’t automatically assign the tix to the person with the most friends commenting, of course; inbound links, twitter searches, etc will all factor in, plus creativity and how sorry I feel for you.

123 thoughts on “Guess What We’ve Got Tickets To?”

  1. Please give these tickets to Jack Balder. There aren’t many 14yr olds that want to spend time with their fathers, let alone at Coachella. Give them this time together and wonderful memories to share. Jen Bayer

  2. Please give the tickets to JACK BALDER. Take part in making this an awesome memory for a boy. How incredible that a 14yr old wants to spend time with his dad and enjoy something they both love. Who knows maybe one day you will have people on here begging for Jack Balder tickets.
    ;-). Go JACK!

  3. This whole thing is getting silly. I’m putting in a good word for Heather because I know that she is really, truly, a very nice person who goes above and beyond to do nice things for other people. Real nice things, like volunteering for the American Cancer Society, not fake nice things like making “an entire orphanage peanut butter sandwich”. She is also a college student who can’t afford the tickets because she has to pay for things like rent and books. Please, give the tickets to Heather Johnson.

  4. Greetings America,

    I wish I could mention all of Heather’s great traits and works tonight in my State of the Union, but i am afraid there are too many worthy issues to talk about tonight. Just know that Heather is in my thoughts.

    Please send her to Coachella, and freedom.


  5. Coachella is on my list of things to do before I die! I’ve been trying to win tickets because I can’t afford to go. I had the money set aside but then spent it on my other list items… PLEASE PLESSE PLEASE! I am a broke college student with tons of medical bills.

  6. I think Jack Balder should win. Well, technically, I should win, but that’s not gonna happen (even though it would make MY Freshman son VERY happy for me to win & take him with me, but I digress…)

    Jack is great & makes his family proud! He is a hard worker & a great student.

    Also, he was never abducted by aliens (as far as I know) or forced to watch the Hannah Montana Movie, and listen to the soundtrack on long family vacations (although both those things might earn him some extra sympathy–so maybe I should check my facts.)

    I feel his presence at Coachella would help make him a better person and also boost his morale (because teen suicide is on the rise–just sayin’)–and help him to fit in as a well-adjusted adolescent at school (’cause you know all the other kids want to go, but only few are gonna actually get to be there & the rest will lie about it).

    Have mercy & just give Jack the tickets–he deserves them!

  7. Ok I believe that everyone has run out of things to say why they deserve the tickets. So in order to keep this thing from getting to crazy and people just down right making stuff up about their friends to win (like my friend Patrick who said the thing about the peanut butter sandwiches; that is not true about me but everything else is). So it’s my opinion that you should reveal the winner soon because honestly this is (as Kari said) getting ludicrous.

  8. I personally think that there’s something off with this Jack Balder kid. He says he’s too busy with school and doesn’t “have time” to give back to the community in his video (and yes, I did watch that) and that’s just, in my opinion, an excuse. Everyone has school, a job, but no one here is making excuses about why they’re not giving back or help the community. Never mind that, because that’s only a part of the big picture, but there is something seriously off about this Jack Balder kid that just rubs me the wrong way. And I usually have a decent intuition. Just saying.

  9. Dear Everypersons,

    This is THE Hustle Man. If y’all vote for HEATHER to win this shit I promise to personally perform my #1 World Excellence Hit Jam Track “Pick Up The Pieces” at all of your birthday parties.

    Hustle Man

    Here’s a sample of my musical stylings:

  10. I don’t want to scare anyone, but i have heard something…..more than a rumor, less than fact…..that i suspect is true. A cute rodent friend of Heather’s took a lot of steroids when he heard she might lose. Just watch the following:

    Now i know nothing for certain, but i am pretty certain this bunny said it would DESTROY COACHELLA if Heather wasn’t there. Does anyone really want to risk that?

    God watch over us all

  11. First off, saying that you usually having a decent intuition in an attempt to support one side of an argument is both a logical fallacy and an invalidly biased statement.

    Second, why do you think that there is something seriously off about one of my best friends? Sure, he isnt the prettiest fellow and is not exactly a rhodes scholar, but you should still be ashamed of yourself for resorting to a tactic as crappy as smearing the other side of the contest in an attempt to elevate yours. Dont you dare talk bad about my friend without a valid reason to do so. Jack is a kind and noble individual that lives his life with purpose and integrity, and I refuse to let ANYBODY try to defame him and portray him as something less.

    Third, Jack never said that he didn’t support his community, he simply said that he hasnt ever done something like raise money for cancer. He is actually rather involved in our community. Additionally, our schedule is usually wake up at 6, get to school 7:15, start practice at 3, get home at 5:30, do homework until 9:30 or so, and then go to bed. Most saturdays are spent at meets. He tries to get in as much service as he can with his minimal free time but he is truly incapable of pursuing a cause as noble as cancer research at this time.

    Fourth, I would like to commend Heather Johnson on HER raising money for cancer. I know multiple people that have it in some form or another and I really appreciate what she is doing.

    Now, not only are Jack’s and Mr. Balders trips riding on these tickets, but myself, my father, and two of our other friends trips are as well, and none of the four of us have EVER been to coachella before. My dad was the only other adult going and he will not go if he is the only adult in attendance.He said iIt was something about it being irresponsible to take on that much responsibility. But anyway, there are not only two trips to Coachella riding on these tickets; there are six.

    In conclusion, I am imploring, beseeching, begging you on my hands and knees. Please give these tickets to Jack Balder. You would brighten the days of four future productive members of society AND those of two of their guardians. :)

  12. “First off, saying that you usually having a decent intuition in an attempt to support one side of an argument is both a logical fallacy and an invalidly biased statement.”

    Actually, intuition is purely subjective and IS itself biased. I have a decent intuition when it comes to getting the wrong vibe from people. There is NO such thing as “invalidly biased”. There is no “VALIDITY” when it comes to a bias. -_- A bias cannot be “invalid”, as it is purely a judgment made by the biased person. There is no such THING as an “invalid bias”. And there is NO logical fallacy. I wasn’t arguing anything. How is me stating that I feel that there is something off with this Jack guy from my intuition LOGICALLY FALSE? To me what I said was pretty clear: my intuition told me that Jack seemed a little off. Please explain to me how that is logically false? Actually first explain to me how that isn’t logic in itself.

    In addition, I can say anything I want about someone else. There IS something off about Jack that I just can’t deal with. It bothers me. And DID I try to elevate myself in my post? I’m not even in the running for the tickets. I’ve read through the comments and made my own judgments, but it is NOT your place to tell me what I dare and do not dare to say. The fact that you believe Jack is all that you say he is doesn’t change the fact that I personally feel that there’s just something off about him. I HAVE a valid reason to state that. Through personal experience of just getting a feel of a person (although the internet is just a bit far-fetched, although still do-able)I have come to my own conclusions.

    Don’t try to sound smarter than you actually are, kid. You might end up looking more stupid.

    That said, good luck to whoever is in the running, because everyone else has put up a valiant effort.

  13. Alright, I’m cutting these off. It’s gonna take me forever to find the winner. You people are total nut jobs! Which is perfect. I love you all.

    We’ll let you know when we anoint a winner.

  14. Comments are now closed. The winner will not be announced, because the battle was so vociferous. But if you haven’t heard from me, you did not win. I’m so sorry I didn’t have enough tickets for everyone! Believe me. I didn’t even get enough tickets to give any to myself. Or to other Metblogs writers.

    If you want to go bad enough, you will find a way. :)

Comments are closed.