This Week’s Featured Metro Rider

metroriderA few weeks ago, I had the displeasure of riding the Metro across from a girl who was plucking her eyebrows. This week I found an even more offensive character who clearly has zero regard for his fellow passengers. Based on this debonair gentleman’s devil-may-care attitude, I assume that he somehow came under the mistaken presumption that the city bus is not a shared ride, but rather his own personal mode of transportation upon which he can do whatever he likes, such as kicking back, taking up several seats, putting his wet shoes on the seat (it was raining that day) and horking down an extremely pungent container of fried rice. This guy is a class act all the way. I can only imagine the lucky girl (or guy) who gets to come home to this every night.

Those of you who ride the Metro are surely familiar with the rules they announce over the PA on regular intervals – don’t place your feet on the seats, no eating, drinking or smoking allowed. In fact, for the latter three, you could apparently be fined up to $250, that is if there were Metro officials who actually enforced these rules. However, since I do not have the authority to fine individuals like this, nor do I think it’s a good idea to confront strangers on public transportation, I will do the one thing I am comfortable with. That is, mocking jerks like this in a public forum in the hopes of shaming people in general into being considerate. I’ll let you know how that all works out.

23 thoughts on “This Week’s Featured Metro Rider”

  1. You should do a new york edition, where you chronicle the guy trying to piss out the door on the other side of the subway, urinating all over everyone, while you had to watch it roll around as the train lurched to and fro. Jump up on the seats everyone!

    Bad food doesnt seem SO bad does it?

  2. Perhaps you’re smarter than me. But. I would have confronted the asshole. Very loudly. “Excuse me? Asshat? Perhaps you’re not aware of the rules of etiquette OR the rules for riding the Metro for that matter. Either close that lid and put that fucking shit away and take your goddamn shoes off the seat or I’ll report. Right after everyone here stares you into submission.”

  3. Yeah, I don’t think so. Not after a close friend of mine was hospitalized after a Metro confrontation, eventually having to have his entire face reconstructed after crawling down the street bleeding for help because onlookers did nothing.

  4. Perhaps you should list the time of the ride, bus number, and route. That way Metro would know to send security of some sort to patrol more often. The driver’s supposed to enforce these things or get backup if he it looks dangerous. Oooh I don’t want a confrontation with smelly fried rice, either! Not after the mace incident.

  5. Thanks, Cyndi. I am searching for how one goes about reporting such things to Metro directly, but I am hesitant to advertise my specific comings and goings on Metblogs, like the exact times and locations you can find me! Yes, and I agree with you, as rude as this guy was, fried rice is not worth the potential outrage of some lunatic. ;-)

  6. Why do some people seem to think it’s a requirement to have lived in NYC before writing about the LA Metro? I have lived all over the place in cities with public transportation and this is still rude no matter where you go.

  7. I think New Yorkers are jaded as they’ve had to deal with Metro assholes for a longer period of time. I’ve ridden the DC Metro ever since its inception and I have confronted morons before. Maybe it’s the area but I never felt threatened by the idiot and once I said something, other people were willing to chime in

  8. Keep these coming Verdell!

    But becareful: If there had been an enforcement authority onboard you would probably have been cited for taking photographs inside a moving bus before Sir Douche McDouchenberg saw a ticket for any of his several violations.

    And the fine clearly would have been doubled for your failure to dismiss his bad habits due to lack of the now-required NYC cred.

  9. I think Pip is just pointing out how one LA womens “Asshat” is another NYC guys “I didn’t even notice.”

  10. One LA woman’s “asshat” is another woman’s asshat anywhere, from NYC to Karachi. And just because some people might not notice it in New York (or anywhere) doesn’t mean it’s ok. It just means those non-noticers have low standards for public behavior.

  11. I saw this guy on the 240/150 coming home from the arclight in the valley, he was standing the whole time facing everyone and it looked like he was adjusting his package the whole trip.

  12. pretty sure they never mention any rule about placing your feet on the seats. Almost every other city has rules about that but I have yet to hear or see any mention of it in LA.

  13. True story: Once, on the number 2 bus, I saw a dude reach into his bag, pull out an entire brick of cheddar, unwrap it and eat it like a candy bar. Not as smelly as fried rice, but still totally gross.

  14. Someone I work with frequently saw John Scott, the old guy that was putting up “Who is John Scott?” stickers and was recently arrested, on the bus and told the driver whenever he saw Scott putting up stickers. He said that every time the driver said something to the effect of “yeah, we all know who it is, but what do you want me to do?” For his trouble, my coworker was grabbed by Scott and was told that the next time Scott saw him, he would be killed. The driver on this occasion heard this, but didn’t do anything.

  15. I think the take-away from all this is that security fucking sucks on the LA Metro, you can get the crap beaten out of you with no one to come to your aid, and the Metro drivers are impassive and unhelpful.

    Way to go, Metro.

    Maybe you should take some of those dollars you swing at ads (the copious dollar amounts used to be the one check that would sustain our struggling publication when I was still at the LA Alternative Press) and spend it on training your employees better.

  16. Not sure if that shame thing works. It certainly does not work with the hand-held cell phoning drivers, or the parking a-holes. I think these douchebags by definition have no shame.

    As for the NY comparison, those folks were not saying you can’t write about the metro. They were simply saying, as awful as this behavior was, in their opinions, it pales in comparison to what subway riders and station scuzzies in NYC do. Having grown up in NY, I’d have to agree with them.

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