Who needs a parade after the parade of terribles exhibited in the aftermath of the Lakers’ championship on Sunday? Oh, we still do. Well, no fear! Thanks to a high-profile list of Who’s-Who of Rich Heterosexual Couples in Los Angeles (Plus a Band of Indians) who will foot the estimated $900,000 cost of the parade, we can join the Lakers downtown this morning at 11 to celebrate their/Kobe’s Shaq-less win. The festivities will start at Staples Center, then will proceed down Figueroa to the Coliseum. From the looks of this map [links to PDF], it looks like all surrounding streets en route, including Venice, Washington, Adams, and the area around USC will be closed or severely impacted, so plan your morning commute accordingly.
After this amazing event, who wants to see what other kinds of donation magic the Mayor can tap from these donors? An example script: “GO LAKERS! Please contribute to our general education fund so we don’t have to lay off teachers at schools your kids don’t attend. GO LAKERS!” Ah, so that’s how business is done in this town.