Leaf Blower – The Soundtrack To Hell

The leaf blower and I have long been at odds.  Ever since my very first hangover, it’s an inevitable aural torture clawing at my ears just under my window early in the morning at all the wrong times.  These days I don’t party like an inept teenager.  I’m a professional lush with a careful grasp of how to minimize damage. So, for me, the new issue is the frequent 24 hour days I pull and the lack of sleep I get trying to shove entire lifetimes into every week.  Just like being hungover, extreme exhaustion is painful and the bone jarring sound of a leaf blower is enough to induce murderous intent.

In recent weeks I have begun working very late into Saturday morning, which is essentially still my Friday.  I get to bed between 6 am and 8 am.  At 9 am, for some reason I have yet to fathom, the groundskeeper for my complex cranks up his leaf blower and does his thing for an hour – thirty minutes of which tends to be right beneath my window as if he has some special radar for degenerates who don’t keep normal schedules.  

I am starting to give a great deal of thought to Mister Reed’s suggestion that the contraptions should be banned.  At very least, there should be some rules about when they are used.  What genius thought that Saturday morning would be a great time to use such an invasive piece of equipment?!  It’s L.A.  We work hard.  We play hard.  Many of us are crashed out on Saturday morning or otherwise reduced to a twitching pile of flesh.  We’d like some peace, or what passes for it living in a city.

I guess if you see a news story about  a woman out in North Hollywood involving a leaf blower, you’ll know I finally couldn’t take it any longer.

3 thoughts on “Leaf Blower – The Soundtrack To Hell”

  1. El Chavo’s “solutions” aside, there are municipal laws in place regarding leaf blowers — specifically gas-powered ones.

    Found on the LAPD website Noise Enforcement Guidelines page:

    Gas Powered Leaf Blower Enforcement

    Gas powered leaf blowers increase the presence of airborne particles, which may cause problems for persons suffering from asthma, hay fever, or other upper respiratory ailments.

    Los Angeles Municipal (LAMC) Section 112. 04 (c) bans the use of the gas powered leaf blower device to minimize the nuisance and health related problems attributed to this type of equipment.

    112.04(c) LAMC
    The following ordinance became effective on February 13, 1998:

    “No gas powered blower shall be used within 500 feet of a residence at anytime. Both the user of such a blower as well as the individual who contracted for the services of the user if any, shall be subject to the requirements of and penalty provisions for this ordinance. Violation of the provisions of this subsection shall be punishable as an infraction in an amount not to exceed One Hundred Dollars($100).”

    This section does not preclude anyone from using other devices such as a gas powered vacuum device or electric leaf blower.

    Officers enforce Los Angeles Municipal Code Section 112.04(c) in the same manner as any other infraction.

    The Los Angeles Police Department has primary enforcement responsibility for this Ordinance. Community members may also register complaints with the Street Use Inspection Division, Department of Public Works, at 1-800-996-CITY (Leaf blower Complaint Line).

  2. every tuesday, the leaf blower guy blows leaves from my neighbor’s property on to the street in front of my house and into my backyard. within a day, the wind has blown them back. it’s a vicious cycle. and my neighbor is, apparently, an idiot.

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