Le Tard Parking du Jour — Double Stuff Edition

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This driver not only straddled the line and took up two spaces, the space on the right is clearly marked “10 Minute Customer Parking,” so if (s)he parked for more than 10 minutes, then bing! bing!, they committed a second violation and can move onto our bonus parking ‘tard round. Actually, “‘tard” is an inaccurate and too charitable term for these folks. I suggest we change it to reflect the deliberate awareness of their actions. How about “asshole?” Or “dickhead?” Maybe “PMLALP” (Person who Makes Life in Los Angeles Less Pleasant)? Any other suggestions?

9 Replies to “Le Tard Parking du Jour — Double Stuff Edition”

  1. Krazydad — I don’t think this is a “fail” at all. I think the vast majority of parking ‘tards posted here, including this one, tried to park precisely this way and succeeded completely.

    Lezgull — I like!

  2. More suggestions:
    ======================================================
    (small type) parking (large) ABUSE
    it’s not just a bad idea IT’S AGAINST THE LAW
    ======================================================
    FRIENDS DON’T LET FRIENDS PARK STUPID
    does this mean you don’t have any friends?
    ======================================================
    PARKING ABUSE CAUSES BAD CAR KARMA
    Can you really afford it in Los Angeles?
    ======================================================
    WHOEVER TAUGHT YOU TO DRIVE MUST BE SO PROUD OF YOU
    ======================================================
    I’D LEAVE AN INTELLIGENT COMMENT BUT EITHER YOU DON’T
    KNOW HOW TO READ OR AREN’T INTELLIGENT.
    ======================================================
    INTELLIGENT CAR—POOR THING HAS A STUPID DRIVER
    THE CAR CAN’T PARK ITSELF, EVEN IF IT WOULD LIKE TO
    ======================================================
    DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW EMBARRESSED YOUR CAR IS WITH
    YOUR PARKING SKILLS?
    ======================================================
    PSYCHOLOGICAL STUDIES SHOW PEOPLE WHO CAN’T PARK PROPERLY
    HAVE SEXUAL ISSUES. FANCY CARS ARE NOT A CURE.
    ======================================================

  3. Thanks Mike. I like “Parking Douche.” The word “douche” is very versatile, with all its variations — “douchebag” (of which “douche” in this context is really a shortened version), the adjective “douchey,” the noun “douchiness” and its synonym “douchery.” Perhaps an especially egregious practitioner can be called “Il Douche” (with accent, pronounced “Il Dou-chay,” a lot like Mussolini’s title).

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