World’s Ugliest Automobile?

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Say hello to my big friend. Spotted in a parking garage in the Marina (where, hopefully, it stays during daylight hours), it’s the Pontiac AztekIntroduced for the 2001 model year, the Aztek is often regarded as the World’s Ugliest Car.

Say hello to my absurdly high waistline. Say hello to my undersized wheels and my overhanging front. Say hello to my double-decker front and glass rear ends. I’m bulky, yet my lower ribs are showing, ain’t that a feat? Don’t I look like a giant Prius? But I’m no hybrid, I’m just a mutant.
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Unfortunately, the Aztek isn’t just butt-ugly, it’s also large. However, it cannot accurately be called an SUV, since there’s no “S” involved. I guess it’s just a UV, meaning “Utility Vehicle,” or, more appropriately, “Ugly Vehicle.” Mercifully, the Aztek was put to death in 2005. Most Aztek buyers seem to have traded theirs in for something less unsightly.  I wonder how many of them will now admit to having owned one.

18 Replies to “World’s Ugliest Automobile?”

  1. It’s really too bad it’s so ugly. I seem to remember it having lots of cool and useful features. Hopefully someday they’re integrate those into something better looking.

  2. Daveshare, someone did, Honda with its not quite as ugly Element. (I’m not a fan of the completely utilitarian box shape though several legions of others did jump on the bandwagon).

  3. Daveshare — you’re right. According to Wikipedia, “In support of the Aztek’s intended role as an accoutrement for a youthful, active lifestyle it offered a number of novel options/accessories, such as a center console that doubled as a removable cooler, a tent/inflatable mattress package that along with a built-in air compressor allowed the Aztek to double as an camper. Extending this image was a seatback mounted backpack, and a number of specialty racks for bicycles, canoes, snowboards and other such objects.”

    And I agree with Frazgo that Honda aimed the Element at the same Mountain-Dew drinking mountain biking demographic. The Element incorporates nifty features like seats that strap to the sides, an interior that can be hosed down, and doors that open from the center with no center pillar, providing a giant and inviting space to hang out with the bikes and listen to Death Cab For Cutie.

  4. The Aztek was hideous the first time I saw it. I have an Element though and it is a great car. It may be considered ugly but it is relatively small on the outside but very roomy and useful on the inside. Great mountain bikes and other crap.

  5. Come to think of it, the Aztek itself could be considered a Death Cab For Cutie. Or the Death of Cute.

  6. Marshall, the basic body style was sold as a Buick at the same time, not as much ugly plastic bits were tacked on but it was the basic body

  7. It was the Buick Rendezvous. Nothing like taking a problem and multiplying it. Can you imagine showing up for a “rendezvous” in one of those?

  8. My ex-girlfriend had one and we drove it on many a road trip.

    Excellent pickup, smooth ride and decent gas mileage.

    I rather liked it.

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