Jack Black and Cee-Lo
sing “Kung Fu Fighting”
So – now that Mark and Steve blogged the setup –
Here’s one way to throw a Hollywood premiere:
You close off the entire block in front of the Chinese Theatre and pave it with glittering black astroturf and thick red carpet.
You erect a dozen plywood pavilions of red-gold-and-celadon plywood and upholster them with richly-patterned Chinese silk.
You inflate your fat, eager, clumsy vinyl hero balloon with helium to a length of about 40 feet, wire him up to loom 50 feet over the Grauman’s front walk …
You put several tons of fresh fruit, bagels, donuts, sugary cereal, and other noshies out on tables with big silver urns full of hot coffee and cold orange juice.
You hire instructors in hip-hop dance, stilt-walking, kung fu.
You leave the sidewalks ringing the circus open so hundreds of tourists can gawk and wave cameras and autograph books over the thronged barricades and the Darth Vaders and Spidermen and Jack Sparrows can keep working the crowd.
You get Jack Black and Lucy Liu and the rest of the cast (Angelena’s too pregnant in Paris, or so the word was) to parade the red carpet. You let the former spend a good half hour gooning for cameras and shaking hands with fans, the latter pose with kids and vogue for the carefully arrayed telephoto firing squad.
You hire Cee-Lo and Black to sing and mug for the crowd (video here).
You lay out the free popcorn and sodas with little plastic bobbleheads of the movie’s main characters on the lids and you welcome the mob inside.
(Proud disclaimer: I’m married to this particular movie’s associate producer).
And you make sure it’s a damn good movie, with a ton of action and humor and gorgeous design and thrilling animation and wicked kung fu action and soul that took more than 300 brilliant artists and developers more than four years to make – every single second of which shows on the screen.
Then you plan to debut the thing this Thursday and hope the word gets out beyond one obviously biased guy raving on a blog that people (of any age) should check it out because it really is that good.
Or at least that’s how Dreamworks does it.