ICME: Generic Boutique Hotel

It’s almost like people don’t even try any more or like Hollywood, figured all the good ideas have been taken so let’s get on with the rehash.

Custom Hotel.

I’d love to go upside the head speak to the genius who came up with this name. I snapped the photo on Lincoln Blvd. because it amused me. I did a quick internet search to find that this is real. Yeah…I admit to being such an Angeleno that I am sure a good chunk of the stuff that makes me laugh are props for movies. And I’m still not 100% convinced that it’s not a prop. Why? I have several reasons:

  1. The generic name that you expect to see on Ironic Island in Second Life (I made up the name of the island since I don’t actually play SL, so don’t go looking for it).
  2. The font that is a straight rip-off of the original Corporate Boutique Hotel: W Hotel.
  3. The photos of the inside of the hotel look like Ikea and DWR had a design-off in it. And no one won.
  4. And lastly, the website. How am I supposed to take this seriously?:

Comfortable, fun and whimsical, stylish yet modestly priced, Custom is an international boutique hotel in Los Angeles that thrives off the energy and atmosphere of its local environs, providing hotel guests a uniquely L.A. lifestyle experience. Our hotel is located minutes from LAX (Los Angeles International Airport) in Westchester. A short drive from Marina del Rey, Manhattan Beach, Venice, Santa Monica and Malibu, the hotel is conveniently situated near the 10, 405 and 105 freeways, allowing easy access to nearby businesses and leisure destinations within the general Los Angeles area and Southern California.

Custom Hotel offers a stylish and innovative perspective to overnight stays. Situated high on a hill on Lincoln Boulevard, our 250 guest rooms and suites offer some of the city’s most stunning panoramic views of the Pacific Ocean, Malibu, Hollywood and Downtown Los Angeles. The hotel features espresso check-in, an on-the-go breakfast bar, Bistrotek restaurant, heated outdoor pool, stadium sundeck, Hopscotch pool bar and grill, poolside cabanas, fire pit and DJ lounge.

That second paragraph sounds like it was ripped from my hotel I created in The Sims 2. And what the hell is ‘espresso check-in’? Do they load you up with coffee while they take forever checking you in just like the W Hotels? Or are they being cute and it’s supposed to be like ‘express’? I have no idea. The only thing I do know it that supposedly it’s “a good layover”.

Guffaw.

6 Replies to “ICME: Generic Boutique Hotel”

  1. I am sure a good chunk of the stuff that makes me laugh are props for movies

    You’ve been living in L.A. too long and absorbing yourself in the so-called “L.A. experience” if you have become inept at distinguishing the difference between a faux facade and a real one. You shouldn’t exult in you laughter, though, as Nathanael West amply emphasizes in The Day of the Locust, perhaps the ultimate Los Angeles novel:

    “But not even the soft wash of dusk could help the houses. Only dynamite would be of any use against the Mexican ranch houses, Samoan huts, Mediterranean villas, Egyptian and Japanese temples, Swiss chalets, Tudor cottages, and every possible combination of these styles that lined the slopes of the canyon.

    “On the corner of La Huerta Road was a miniature Rhine castle with tarpaper turrets pierced for archers. Next to it was a highly colored shack with domes and minarets out of the Arabian Nights. Again he was charitable. Both houses were comic, but he did not laugh. Their desire to startle was so eager and guileless.” (Pg. 262)

    Sharpen your gaze, Fab. Nathanael West did and he wasn’t even from L.A.

  2. How funny you should post on this. I just saw this for the first time today. My friend, who just graduated from LMU, said he went drinking there and stayed there. He seemed to like it.

    Lame name though, I agree.

  3. @dave…we were thinking of going over there for drinks…once we get some money and wind up all the way over there, we probably will.

    @fraz…like the old Lucky store brand items “Cereal”.

  4. I hear their restaurant, Bistrotek, is great, from a friend of mine who went there to do a review.

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