Virus Spreads to ArcLight

Dear Annoying Couple Sitting in F-17 and F-18 at the December 15th 8:30pm Showing of I Am Legend at ArcLight Sherman Oaks,

You are douche bags. Huge, unbelievable douche bags. You not only discussed every trailer as it ran, you chatted through the entire movie. Non-stop. An impressively irritating 101 minutes. It was as if you have never been to the movies before. Maybe you had never even been out in public before. “Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh my God. Oh Sam. Oh Sam. Oh Sam.”

Shut. The. Fuck. Up.

Seriously. What is this, AMC Burbank? Stop talking to the screen. You are the reason people stopped going to the movies in 1990.

I’m not trying to hate. I’m trying to help. I want you to know how stupid you sound so you can do something about it. I don’t want you to be sitting at your house on New Year’s Eve wondering why none of your friends came to your party. Yes, it’s because they don’t like you. You grate on their every nerve. Let’s work on that for ’08. Mmmkay?

Sincerely,

F-16

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11 Replies to “Virus Spreads to ArcLight”

  1. I have no problem asking people to be quiet, escalating it to shut up, and then notifying staff.

    I think in all my years of going to the Arclight I’ve only had to ask someone to be quiet once, but it worked.

  2. Other than the 1/2 mile hike from lot to theater, I am loving the Sherman Oaks Arclight. There seem to be a bit less people, as the crowd isn’t so hipster, more like normal people.

    But moviegoers are a-holes everywhere. My last bad movie experience was at the Arclight Hollywood. 1/2 the crowd sat down after the movie started (against Arclight policy, and my vociferous complaints after the movie earned me a “sorry” from the manager), and the 60 year old man next to me both answered his cell phone and made a call during the film. I told him to get off the phone and go to the lobby, not very nicely.

    The whole concept of reserved seating, which in my opinion is the greatest thing in the world, seems very complicated for many Arclight visitors. I think the Arclight should raise their prices – to further keep out morons. Maybe require a college education too.

    It is hysterical to me that Burbank is mentioned – the AMC Burbank is home to perhaps the worst moviegoers in the world (no wait, that would be Citywalk – that theatre is hell on earth. Actually Citywalk is hell on earth). Cell phone use at the AMC Burbank seems to be the norm – I think entitled young Armenians think it is their right to use cell phones anywhere, anytime. The single worst movie experience I ever had was there – for a movie about gangbangers and rap music, imagine that. I have also been in a movie there where a moviegoer translated the whole film for his mother, line by line. That was great.

    I love my 50″ HD TV and Netflix. I got the pause button, and if you act up in my house, you better leave or I will bust a cap in your ass. I guess I am an idiot though, I keep going back to the movies.

  3. Talking through the trailers is to be expected–it’s a show biz thing. But, during the film? Get up, go to the Arclight ticket seller and complain. They’ll refund you and/or tell the offenders to quiet down, at least in Hollywood. In the Valley, can’t say, but it’s worth a shot.

    On the other hand, you’re prepared for awards season, right? When every card carrying Guild member in town goes to movies for free and talks all the way through them.

  4. “This is what you get for going to the movies in the Valley”. It’s just not the valley. It’s everywhere, not just the Valley, not just in LA.

  5. You should have gotten an usher immediately and explained the situation. It’s the only chance you have of shutting people up these days. Rude theater patrons feel so entitled to their rudeness, they just tell you to f*** off even when you ask them politely to stop talking.

    Note to movie theater managers: The best way to increase ticket sales and overall audience enjoyment is to have an usher stay in the movie theater the entire length of the show.

  6. HEY G, thats not very nice. you are probably one of the people that lives in Los Angeles and likes to “bag” on the valley but voted against us separating from Los Angeles so you could still get our tax money! JEEZ. Give us a break.

  7. *sigh*

    The Hollywood Arclight has begun to descend into a Valley-esque movie going experience and I was hoping the Sherman Oaks Arclight might be my saving grace. :(

  8. UGH!!!

    This reminds me of the time my girlfriend and I saw “Clerks 2” at the Hastings Ranch Pacific Theater (now closed) here in Pasadena.

    This chick came in..like..halfway through the movie..sad down behind us…talked on her cell phone..and had a CRYING BABY with her.

    I turned around and said to her, most un-politely “Who the fuck brings a BABY to a KEVIN SMITH film?”

    Then one of the ushers came and asked her to leave.

  9. If you think it’s bad in Burbank, you should try Irvine!

    I spent 15 bucks to see I Am Legend in IMAX, just to have a group behind me treating the movie as if it needed guided descriptions on what was going on.

    Maybe if people would use their brains and figure it out as the movie plays on then maybe, just maybe, it might be worth it.

    But then again, at 15 bucks a pop for a ticket, I’ll just wait to buy it on DVD and fire up the 50 inch plasma, crank the sound, and grab a beer from the fridge. Now that is a true movie experience.

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