Q: What do Oprah, Jagger, and Uncle Vlad have in common?

http://blogging.la/archives/images/2007/07/svetlana-thumb.jpgA: They all have a cameo appearance in this week’s “Social Studies” on KCRW. The brainchild of funny woman Iris Bahr, “Social Studies” airs Monday afternoons at 4:44 and never fails to make me laugh out loud even if I’m battling rush hour traffic. The star of the show is Svetlana Maksimovolskahyah (pictured at right), Bahr’s high-end Russian prostitute alter-ego, whose four minute quasi-stream-of-consciousness covers sex with the stars, current events, and life in LA, all in a fabulous Russian accent.

Svetlana’s take on Daniel Radcliffe (aka Harry Potter) after the break:

…he used to be cute, now he looks like Elijah Wood only with smaller face and lemon up his butt. Small lips, tiny nose, almost like his face forgot it was supposed to have features.

At least with Elijah, you look at his eyes you think wow this guy is alert, less lemon up the butt more sycamore tree.

And on the cult of celebrity:

…audiences from all over the country they don’t care about quality, they are just happy to see celebrity. Oh, King Lear in the Park starring Owen Wilson?! Wow! And who is playing Cordelia? Britney Spears of course. Are you coming? Oh no, I have tickets to see Faust with Matthew McConaughey.

I love Mattie though, I have to tell you, he is so much fun, he is like walking southern sunshine this guy. When I have sex with him I always feel like I am eating fresh fruit by the Mississippi river or something.

You can listen to “Social Studies” online if you miss it on the radio. But if you’re crawling home from work this afternoon, cursing everyone else on the 405, turn the dial to 89.9 and you might find yourself laughing despite the fact that everyone on the freeway is an idiot but you.

5 Replies to “Q: What do Oprah, Jagger, and Uncle Vlad have in common?”

  1. Hmm. Well, 5000!, I know I especially love them because I spend a fair amount of time with Russians and her parody of the accent tickles me.

    And Colin, what ads do you mean?

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