Coming Soon to a Screen Near You

There’s been an incredible story unfolding in the news for the past few months. It’s about two elderly women, Helen Golay and Olga Rutterschmidt. They were first investigated for insurance fraud because they were insuring indigent men for millions of dollars (and then the men were turning up dead). Well, now they’re linked directly to the crime. They’re set for arraignment tomorrow.
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Here’s a pretty good summary of the story up to last week.

The story is too juicy to not be made into some film version. Here are my casting suggestions:

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The Granny Grifters (Feature) – written as a tour de force performance opportunity for all actors involved, this version of the story focuses the machinations of the Golay and Rutterschmidt as their [alleged] murderous plans fall apart and the police begin their investigations. Starring Shirley MacLaine as Helen Golay and Lily Tomlin as Helen Rutterschmidt. Directed by Nora Ephron.

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The Golden Girls of Opportunity (HBO) – This version plays the story as a viscious satire taking the point of view of Golay and Rutterschmidt as women trying to take what’s rightfully theirs through a series of [alleged] escalating grifts that they rationalize using their tragic upbringings. Starring Carol Burnett as Helen Golay and Kathryn Joosten as Helen Rutterschmidt. Directed by Gus van Sant.

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With Devious Intent: The Kecia Golay Story (Lifetime Movie)- this strange take on the story focuses on Golay’s daughter, Kecia, as the main character as she gets caught up on escalating manipulation and then murders [allegedly] perpetrated by Golay & Rutterschmidt. Starring Tori Spelling as Kecia Golay, Angie Dickinson and Helen Golay and Dixie Carter as Olga Rutterschmidt. Directed by Darren Star.

(I’m looking forward to the HBO version.)