Please Refrain From Shooting While I’m Sleeping

Last night, I made the mistake of finishing an energy drink too close to bedtime. And by “bedtime”, I mean “one in the morning”, which was when I got home from Perversion. Sleep was spotty, at best.

It really didn’t help when I heard what sounded like gunshots at some point in the middle of the night. Two, to be exact. At least, I think they were gunshots – I have very little idea of what a gun actually sounds like outside of the movies. But given that I heard sirens shortly afterwards, I’m going with gunshots. If anyone actually knows what happened last night in Venice Beach, feel free to fill me in.

Of course, this comes two days after yet another conversation with my father, back up in BC, in which I explain that no, not everyone in L.A. runs around shooting each other. Every so often, I have to explain to Dad that I live in a neighborhood that is just fine, that it’s being regentrified, that there’s cops patrolling it and no one is getting capped. Usually, that’s pretty true. I’m hoping it still is, and that the shots were really firecrackers or something.

However, this weekend, I’ll be out of Venice and its (possible) shootings anyways. I’m going back up to my old stomping grounds in Seattle for the weekend. I didn’t realize it when I scheduled the trip, but it is actually Seafair weekend up there, featuring hydroplane races (NASCAR on the lake), and the Blue Angels (NASCAR in the sky) and the city’s attempts to sophisticate things up with concerts to make up for all those traditional noisy events. So have a great weekend everyone – and if you can find it, my parking spot in Venice is up for grabs over the next four days.

10 Replies to “Please Refrain From Shooting While I’m Sleeping”

  1. Jillian:

    Though I have yet to see a Fire Department related incident (i.e. response of Firefighters and/or Paramedics) in your area that coincides with your description, here are the only responses we had in the Venice area last night during the hours of darkness:

    Thursday, 10:26 PM Assault Victim, 100 block of South Speedway

    Friday, 12:56 AM Automatic Fire Alarm at the Holiday Inn, 737 East Washington Boulevard

    Clearly, the sirens could have been related to another agency, and if perchance there were shots fired (yet no one injured) or the victim had fled the scene, it could have remained entirely within the realm of our friends in law enforcement.

    Again, no shooting incidents were reported to the Fire Department overnight in the Venice Beach area. If it would help put your mind more at ease, please do not hesitate to use the 3-1-1 system to be connected with your Community Police Station. I am confident that the Officers there would be pleased to address your inquiry.

    Kindly accept our best wishes for safe and restful sleep!

    Respectfully Yours in Safety and Service,

    Brian Humphrey
    Firefighter/Paramedic
    Public Service Officer
    Los Angeles Fire Department

  2. I was watching CSI last night and one of the characters said that you were twice as likely to die from a fall on your stairs than from getting shot.

    Is your father worried about your staircase? … maybe he should be!

  3. …and of course CSI is an irrefutable source for information.

    I just want to know where I can get some of those slotmachine whirrling monitors they use to match up stuff.

  4. Sometimes I don’t think I’m too “LA,” but sometime I wonder because the first thing I thought of when I read your posts title was “many, I know, I totally hate it when the damn companies decide to stage their big arc-light scenes in the middle of the night.”

    Ooooh, you meant guns.

    Then again, where I grew up in San Pedro was very close to an old military installation popular for shooting scenes with the kind of shooting you’re talking about.

  5. cranky mcgrumpypants – hee! That’s totally why I gave the source … cuz we know that if it’s on CSI it’s gotta be true.

    Mostly I just didn’t feel like digging up the real source of the stats.

    But I think the gun lobby should be aware of that … you don’t see people trying to remove staircases (and bathtubs) from houses because of the high incidences of death and injury!

  6. ask and ye shall google (and watch out for dem murdering dogs)

    Cause of Death Lifetime Odds
    Heart Disease 1-in-5
    Cancer 1-in-7
    Stroke 1-in-23
    Accidental Injury 1-in-36
    Motor Vehicle Accident* 1-in-100
    Intentional Self-harm (suicide) 1-in-121
    Falling Down 1-in-246
    Assault by Firearm 1-in-325
    Fire or Smoke 1-in-1,116
    Natural Forces (heat, cold, storms, quakes, etc.) 1-in-3,357
    Electrocution* 1-in-5,000
    Drowning 1-in-8,942
    Air Travel Accident* 1-in-20,000
    Flood* (included also in Natural Forces above) 1-in-30,000
    Legal Execution 1-in-58,618
    Tornado* (included also in Natural Forces above)
    1-in-60,000
    Lightning Strike (included also in Natural Forces above) 1-in-83,930
    Snake, Bee or other Venomous Bite or Sting* 1-in-100,000
    Earthquake (included also in Natural Forces above)
    1-in-131,890
    Dog Attack 1-in-147,717
    Asteroid Impact* 1-in-200,000**
    Tsunami* 1-in-500,000
    Fireworks Discharge 1-in-615,488

    source lifescience.com

    but it seems like B.S. to me… asteroids >fireworks?

  7. executice summary:

    death by firearm (1 year) 1 in 398,425
    death by stairs (1 year) 1 in 183,155

    death by firearm (lifetime) 1 in 5,134
    death by stairs (lifetime) 1 in 2,360

    there I’m done

  8. Wow, according to that link level ground is far more dangerous than stairs! Sounds like we should all live stepped lives (or live on trolleys).

    (sorry jillian for co-opting your comment string)

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