carly live blogs the grammy awards

Apparently, the Grammy awards were held last night, which shows you how in touch I am with the damn kids today.

I didn’t watch them, partially because I didn’t know they were on, but mostly because I don’t care. Luckily, I read Carly Milne’s live blog of the show while I drank my coffee this morning, which is about fifteen different kinds of entertaining, and a million percent better than the show could ever hope to be.

8:40
Bono wins my award for Most Affected Lead Singer Ever. I’d hate him if he didn’t have such a great fucking band.

8:47
Please anybody but Kanye.

8:48
Shit.

8:49
What the fuck is he wearing? Kool Moe Dee much? His brain really got mucked in that car accident. People, please. Stop indulging him. Just because he says he’s great doesn’t mean he is. I’m not saying he’s shit, but poor Fiddy. He’s probably crying in his Chinchilla coat right now back in Connetticut.

[. . .]

10:43
Try as I might, I can’t hate “Gold Digger.” Damn you, Kingye.

10:44
Wait, the bimbos in gold bikinis crying “Get the money!” just made me change my mind.

And that’s just the surface. Carly is sofa king funny, and masters that essential part of live blogging, where it’s still entertaining to some jerk reading it after the fact.

3 Replies to “carly live blogs the grammy awards”

  1. U2? U2?! Who ARE the Grammy winner picker people? Seriously. Why not give the Rolling Stones a Grammy too? They’re just as musically relevant these days.

  2. And it misses you!

    Next year, I’m gunning for screen caps. I feel like it would bring that much more to my inane rambling.

    (Wil, you’re my hero.)

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