So tonight marks the return home of my roommate, who was in East Timor for a civil rights conference. We decided to go out and “get plastered” (as he put it), in celebration. And as is tradition, headed to Benito’s taco stand afterwards for late night yums. Little did we know that crazy shit was about to erupt. When racism rears its ugly head, I get very confused; because it is the year 2004, motherfuckas, how you gonna still be that ignorant?
Asshole #1 marches into the establishment as I’m ordering and starts screaming about how he will pay good money for steak because what he got was “literally shit”. As much as we all doubted that he LITERALLY received excrement in place of his steak burrito, he continued by saying, “I’m not an asshole, really, I just want good steak. I know you’re all lazy, but seriously, I paid $10 for my meal and I want some fucking food!!!” He opened his take-out box and the food was all scrambled (we later saw him drop his second order of food on the ground outside because he was stumbling drunk) and he insisted that they had given him his food like that. So, granted he was drunk, no one says anything (though one of my friends had to sit on her hands and stuff her mouth with food) and the lady at the register got him a new order. All the while, there is another guy waiting at the counter…
Asshole #2 (aka other waiting guy at counter) begins to speak to the lady at the register in broken, badly pronounced spanish, very loudly and slowly, in the most condescending tone imaginable. The lady, who spoke English just fine, is very patient and does not lose her temper, but my friends and I are livid at the disrespect. When he receives his food, he goes to leave, but stops in the doorway and says “You like La Bamba? Yeah, you like La Bamba,” to the lady and the other guy. Then he turns to my table and says/asks the same thing. My friends either ignore him or mutter, “yeah, sure, whatever”. When he asks me, I say no, so he then says, “You’re a communist.”
Because I am Chinese and because he has already exhibited signs that he is a racist bastard, I say, “FUCK YOU.” And he feigns surprise, why am I being so hostile when he was only making conversation? He then starts into a whole slew of racially charged insults, saying that we (my asian friends and I) were “lucky” that he was talking to us, saying, “in evolution, there are a buncha levels. There are monkeys and then there are people like me. One day you’ll realize how lucky you are that I’m even talking to you.” So at this point, my friend Carmina and I are ready to kick some ass. But her boyfriend Jeff gets up and attempts to alleviate the situation, pushing the guy out the door, telling him to leave because he is upsetting everyone. The guy decides to continue yelling racial slurs and other insults at Jeff, while grabbing hold of Jeff’s arm, refusing to let go. At this point, Asshole’s buddy who had been waiting in a cab, runs out to pull the two apart. Carmina and I also run up, and I pull Jeff away (as he is also ready to kick ass). Asshole and I are in each other’s faces as the buddy attempts to get me away and pull him to the cab. He finally succeeds as I’m about to lose my shit and they exit.
So, dear readers, what the fuck? Granted Asshole was very likely inebriated, but he was completely coherent and ridiculously condescending and racist. (*note, I was completely sober as I was the designated driver) It is 2004, there are (legal!) segregated proms in the South, guys whose cars get bombed in Huntington Beach because they are black, assholes who go into Mexican restaurants and say, “I know you’re all lazy, but…”, and motherfuckers who think they can talk shit to a coupla *poor helpless little asian* girls without there being consequences. My hands were shaking for ten minutes afterwards from anger (and adrenaline that had nowhere to go).
There should have been a beat down tonight.