It has it’s restrained yet overwrought kitsch in the guise of a full-size replica of Michaelangelo’s statue of David (carved from Carrara marble from the same quarry as the original); a stained glass reproduction of Da Vinci’s Last Supper; and something called The World’s Largest Painting, a.k.a. The Crucifixion, that measures 195 by 45 feet and is housed in an enormous square building with a church facade. There’s also The World’s Second Largest Painting, The Resurrection, in the same building and they are both unveiled from behind a huge curtain in an auditorium  presentation with darkened lights and rumbling narration.

Other sections of the “memorial park” evoke patriotism, “wee” Scottish churches and, my favorite, The Mystery of Life, a large sculpture that professes to answer every Big Question you may have.

On one level, this is all kind of a hoot. And maybe the recent announcement that the body of Michael Jackson will be buried at the Glendale Forest Lawn makes some odd kind of sense, aside from the fact that it is, on its most human level, a grieving family interring the remains of a loved one.

I expect the hordes to descend and a renewed period of media feeding frenzy. I won’t be surprised to learn Larry King has pushed to the front of a very long line of television personalities who will pick over the bones of the MJ saga a few thousand more times. I’m sure Forest Lawn will have crowd control measures in place as needed, because after all, a cemetery is a place for quiet reflection, even in a celebrity-manufacturing place like Los Angeles.

And at some point, tranquility will prevail there again.

Today, he spoke with reporters, while his press secretary, Angry Matt Szabo, tweeted from the sidelines:

Mayor just told reporters he will not ask AEG or the Jackson family to cover city expenses for Michael Jackson memorial.

Mayor: Los Angeles is a “world class city.” Providing police and fire protection is “what we do.”

Good to know.

Should a member of your family pass on, rest assured that the LAPD will clear a lane on the freeway for your procession – free of charge.

As an L.A. resident, I, for one, am totally OK with that (the begging, not the footing of the bill). Since us L.A. folks have basically already paid for this, I’d ESPECIALLY love it if non-Angelenos would step up and pitch in. That’s right… not only can you honor the King of Pop, your donations are also tax-deductible! (Click here for the PayPal link)

Want to snail mail your check in?

Donations are being accepted to help defray the costs of providing public safety, traffic control and related costs associated with the Michael Jackson Memorial at the Staples Center. Please submit your donations by check payable to: “City of Los Angeles”.
Donation Mailing Address:
Room 255, City Hall
200 North Spring Street
Los Angeles, CA 90012

Donations of any amount will be gratefully accepted. All donations are tax-deductible.

If you’re a Michael fan, consider giving a small donation to help us celebrate his extraordinary life and music.

PS – Jackson Family, my sincerest condolences for your loss, but please step forward to help foot some of these bills. That goes for you, too, AEG — you stand to make a ton with all the footage from those rehearsal videos at Staples Center, as well as any tribute concerts that are yet to come. Seriously, help a financially strapped city out. It’s not just the right thing to do, but it makes good business sense, as well.

A new King had been crowned in the world of music. He taught us how to walk on the moon and expanded our lyrical vocabulary. He inspired us to to wear zippers that had no function.

A look-a-like contest was held in Hollywood for his legions of fans. The year was 1984.