Those marvelous, magical purveyors of joy at Lucent Dossier will finally returned to a regular presence in their hometown beginning this upcoming Wednesday November 11th.  The new residency will be housed in the post apocolyptic meets vintage hot spot H.Wood in the heart of Hollywood through the end of the year.

If you’ve never experienced Lucent Dossier…. GO!  If you know why so many of us love these people to bits, now is your chance to play again and bring all your friends.

What can you expect from this latest incarnation?

Let the night take you away and if you please, indulge in a rose water foot bath, Post Portal Post Office, uplifting aura readings, Sweet Teddy Bear Tea Party and herbal elixirs to cleanse your soul.  What Lucent does best is create wonderlands for our guests to lose themselves in, so let us be your guide into a fantastical realm where brilliance and insanity fuse together in an exotic kind of ecstatic bliss.

H.Wood is located at 1738 N. Orange, Los Angeles, CA 90028.  Parking can be found in the Hollywood Highland Complex (rates are $2 for 4 hours with validation!)  Dinner is available.  Doors open at 8pm.  The show begins at 9 p.m. and lasts through to midnight.  Stay afterward until 2 a.m. to dance.  General admission is  $15 adv/door (Or join the Lucent Dossier mailing list for discount ticket “secret password.”)  VIP Table reservations are available by contacting H.Wood.

Readers who happen to be old ladies:

Younger men are better looking, healthier, have more energy, are more fun, don’t need Viagra, and won’t die on you!

Such is the rationale for tonight’s California Cougar Convention.  While older men are considered men even though they show off their grays in the form of a young blond, society’s answer to the reverse situation is: predatory animals.  So, in the spirit of the jungle kingdom, the Society of Single Professionals (yes) organized tonight’s convention  for cougars and their would-be cubs at the Beverly Hills Crowne Plaza Hotel.  Thirty dollars will buy you access to the stalking, the pouncing, and the purring; in addition, the young cubs will vote to elect a Miss Cougar California (who must be 40 or over (that’s who an “older woman” is, apparently) and “legally single”) during the night’s dance party.

For those of you who want so desperately to cougar, but don’t know how, take the 6:30 class in cougaring at The Cougar School, free for paid convention goers.  I’m not exactly sure what this will entail, but I’m envisioning the scene from The Lion King where Mufasa teaches Simba how to pounce.  Cubs, heed the sign’s warning: If attacked, fight back.  Zazu should have been so lucky.

When mountain lions attack photo taken by jurvetson and used under a Creative Commons license.

Photo by Annie Liebovitz

The inimitable Rachel Rosenthal has been an icon of performance art for decades, equal parts priestess, goddess, shaman and oracle. The gal’s been honored by the City of Los Angeles as “a Living Cultural Treasure of Los Angeles” and has recently been the subject of several monographs on her performance pieces and life. Not a whole lot of people are well-versed with the panopoly of major names in contemporary art–I myself am certainly not–but if you can add Rachel to your list of cocktail party conversation topics, everyone will know you’ve got your basics down.

In honor of the grand dame of experiential performance art’s 83rd birthday (83rd!), Track 16 Gallery at Bergamot Station will be hosting a birthday bash on Saturday night, with artworks contributed by luminaries of the art world: Ed Ruscha, Robert Rauschenberg, Eleanor Antin, Lita Albuquerque, Judy Baca, John Baldessari, Llyn Foulkes, George Herms, Mike Kelley, Martin Kersels, Ed Moses, Lee Mullican, Betye Saar, Masami Teraoka, Patssi Valdez, and June Wayne. The pieces are to be auctioned off to raise funds for Rosenthal’s dance company, the TOHUBOHU! Extreme Theatre Ensemble, funding student scholarships and visiting artist stipends. Nice.

I know I won’t be able to afford any of these pieces, but I want to go just to take in the assemblage of the 20th century’s great West Coast artists all in one place–a Broad Collection-esque justaposition, cherrypicking the biggest names of the past century. Thank you Rachel. (There’ll also be cake by Cake Divas and “Bitch”-brand wine & bubbly, so, there’s that too.)

Dan over at Drink:Eat:Play is putting on another one of those classy dress up fun events this weekend.  They are transforming the Hollywood Renaissance Hotel into a 1920′s “Speak Easy”.  The tickets are valued at $75 each so this is no slouch of a give away.  Tix include unlimited cocktails in the Speak Easy lounge made from the best whiskey, scotch and gin with the help of The Edison and K&L Wine merchants.

To win.  Tell me your favorite classic cocktail (my choice varies, classic martini, side car or cosmopolitan).   Tell me the ingredients.  Make sure you include a legit email address so I can collect your information for ticket pick up at will call.  Sorry, since this is a booze filled event you must be 21 to enter.  Remember this is a classy event so you have to dress accordingly.  First two complete responses win!

For those of you not fortunate enough to win tix you can order your general admission tix here.  For those of you wanting to splurge for the VIP tickets that include access to a private lounge with all sorts of extra goodies at $150 you can order your tickets here.

Deets: Nov 7, 8PM-11PM,  Hollywood Renaissance Hotel, 1755 N Highland Ave, Hollywood 90028

A true Stargate fan could read this from the back of the room.

I had lunch with a few people recently in which the conversation started and ended with a mention  of “The Plan.” Non-Battlestar Galactica associates quickly booed and told us to leave the table if we were going to talk about it, and, not wanting that, we had to cease (but really, if you’re going to have a whole movie about the Cylons, why oh why would you leave Lucy Lawless out?).  In contrast, I have an inkling that a fair number of you are unabashaed BSG fans and that an ever fairer number of you were/are fans of Farscape and Stargate SG-1. I bet some of you even loudly registered your protest to Sci-Fi brass after the network abruptly, and meanly, cancelled Farscape before its 5-year contract was up.  Lucky for you, there are fan conventions in town for both Farscape and Stargate SG-1.   Starting tomorrow and running through the weekend, Creation Entertainment is hosting the annual event at the LAX Marriot.  Stars will be in tow to commiserate and commemorate, and, of course, people will be dressed up to the gills.  Best part: On Friday, Gary Jones (Stargate‘s Chief Master Sergeant Walter Harriman) and Dean Haglund (you know, Langley) will participate in a celebrity cabaret called Starhole.  Yes, that’s right, Starhole.

Ticket prices vary depending on what days you go, and what a la carte items (i.e., autograph sessions) you want to add to your cart.  For more information on prices for the Stargate convention, see here; for Farscape, see here.

There are four million stories in the City of Angels (ten million in the County), and a bunch of them will be told at the 8th Annual L.A. Storytelling Festival. The Festival, which takes place on Saturday, November 14 at the Culver-Palms UMC Complex in Culver City, will feature stories, tales, concerts, workshops, and more.  Information about the Storytelling Festival, including the lineup of workshops, registration instructions, ticket prices, and directions, can be found at the event’s website here.

What’s the difference between a story and a tale?  Head to the Festival and find out!

Our intrepid photographer CuriousJosh returns with photographic proof that Halloween happened, even though you wouldn’t know if from the trick-or-treater traffic in my ‘hood.

Thanks to the LA Weekly and LA Weekly web editor Erin Broadley for loaning these images–and Josh–to us.

Check out the slideshow here!

Sigh.  Maine.  In a scenario all too familiar to those of us in California, gay marriage opponents currently are celebrating their successful drive to prohibit gay marriage via public vote in the Pine Tree State.  For those of you keeping count, that’s the 31st state in our Union to have the issue defeated at the polls.   Meanwhile, one year after the passage of Prop. 8, gay rights proponents will be meeting en masse tonight at the Vermont and Santa Monica Red Line station at 7.  There, Equality Network will host a Death to Discrimination March, led by a New Orleans-style funeral, headed due north to Sunset, then to The Black Cat/Le BarCito in Silver Lake, where a roster of series will rally the troops.  After an appropriate time for mourning and moving through the stages of grief, organizers plan to continue fighting the good fight (i.e., “Don’t mourn.  Organize.”), and hopefully, there will be some talk about education and de-clawing the anti-marriage coalition’s fear tactics.

It’s not over.

photo by Mc-Q, used under a Creative Commons license

December 8th at the Echoplex. Only $20. Can you beat that friggin’ lineup?

I’d say its impossible, but on December 9th at the adjacent Echo, you’ll have Black Francis with Bob Oedenkirk, Tim & Eric, Dave Lovering, Brian Posehn, and more. Again, for only $20… or $35 for both nights.

Now that I have your attention, let me tell you what its all about: a benefit for the now 8 1/2 month old baby Winston Bertrand.

Winston Bertrand was born on February 20, 2009 with a double whammy of two extremely rare and life-threatening conditions. Winston was born with two rare complex malformations called Lymphatic and Venous Malformations. Lymphatic malformations are varying sized cystic abnormalities of the lymphatic system occurring in perhaps 1 in 10,000 births. His parents, Jennifer and Chris Bertrand have had to practically abandon their business to assist in around-the-clock in-home medical care for baby.

The Pixies’ Black Francis and his badass wife Violet Clark have taken up the cause of spreading the word about Winston and encouraging people to help the Bertrands cover their astronomical medical costs.

And thus the two nights of sheer awesomeness that rival the original Band Aid lineup (although a group performance of “Feed the World/Do They Know Its Christmastime?” would be epic).

Night 1, Tuesday, December 8th, 7pm at the Echoplex: Rockin’ performances by Black Francis w/ Flea, members of the Pixies, Love & Rockets, She Wants Revenge, Weird Al Yankovic, Michael Penn, David J (Love and Rockets/Bauhaus), Grand Duchy (feat: Black Francis & Violet Clark), The 88s. Tickets and more info.

Night 2, Wednesday, December 9th, 7pm at the Echo: An evening of the ‘ol comedy hosted by Black Francis… on stage: Tim and Eric (music set), Bob Odenkirk, Brian Posehn, and Dave Lovering (drummer of the Pixies performing his mad science teacher magic act). Tickets and more info.

CuriousJosh pic, Halloween 2008

Big ups yet again to Mr. Curious for the info. I’m so lazy I hadn’t planned anything for tomorrow yet–not even a costume. Josh, this is my cheat sheet for tomorrow! You’ve made my social life SO much easier.  -Lucinda.

Hello Los Angeles! Looking for something different?

I’m CuriousJosh, once again happily here courtesy of LA Weekly, to let you in on everything from partying in an old church to burlesque queens to costumes amidst the hallowed halls of world-class LA museums. There’s also one post-ghost highlight where House music legend John Tejada plays the intimate Zanzibar next Wednesday. After the weekend, I’ll return with photos from the events, plus some secret happenings I habituate throughout LA’s underground nightlife.

Danse Macabre (Friday)
Visit Danse Macabre for hip haunts in an off-beat venue. An old church provides perfect haunting grounds for the hip and energetic crowd brought together by Shits & Giggles and Jelly Roll. Special performance by host The Lady Tigra. The werewolves will be howling along with DJs Christine Renee, Travis TK Disco (Hot Biscuit), Aaron Castle (A Club Called), Chris Bowen, and Victor Rodriguez. 10p-5a. The Church, 606 E. 6th Street. Limited pre-sale tix for $10. $15 at the door. http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/86732

Miss Kitty’s Parlor (Friday and Saturday)
Miss Kitty’s Parlor presents dual debauchery for Friday and Saturday. Expect an alternative crowd enjoying go-go dancers of all genders, combined with provocative burlesque… Read the rest of this entry →

I could compile a whole “what to do on Dia de los Muertos” thing, but LA Eastside has done such a good job I figured I’d just give them props for a list well compiled. Mosey on over there for an exhaustive list of stuff to do when you’re really hung over from partying all night dressed as Lady Gaga or Balloon Boy. They’ve listed everything from the Calavera Fashion Show at Tropico de Nopal to an electro-en-español-noche at The Little Cave to art shows, an Esotouric tour involving a gigantic house-sized tamal, toy drives and celebrations held at community gardens.

Have a super awesome Halloween costume that you plan to keep forever? Then skip this post, it’s not for you. Our friends at NeighborGoods are having a Halloween Costume Party on Friday that is a little different – you have to bring a costume (don’t wear it) and throw it in a pile with a bunch of other costumes other people brought and then dig through it and find a new one for yourself. It’s crazy for sure, but it’s the NeighborGoods way – and besides it’s a much better use than just throwing that old costume away. There is only limited space and it’s for members of the site only so go sign up if you want in!

So last week we introduced you to our intrepid photographic correspondent, CuriousJosh, and he gave you his list of destinations for the weekend…here’s the recap, in photos!

I myself was at the “Thrill the World” event at LA Live (the video I shot is here), where a zombie army over 6000 strong assembled to dance the “Thriller” dance–all in unison, all at once. It was epic. Great seeing you there, Josh! (His pics are here at the Weekly.)

Also, he swung by Dia de los Muertos at Hollywood Forever Cemetery…the full gallery is at the LA Weekly in all its gory glory! All photos shared with LA Metblogs courtesy of CuriousJosh & the LA Weekly.

By Halloween party of course I mean rock show. Thursday, October 29th at the Center for the Arts in Eagle Rock The Night Marchers will be playing with Jail Weddings, SeaSpin, Night Horse and a bunch of other random halloween themed spooky shit. This is being put on by the folks at Buddyhead and FYF Fest and while most people have to pay to get in, I’ve got 2 pair of tickets to give away. They could be yours. Want them? Usually I’d come up with some witty trivia or something but you would probably just google it and then try to pretend like you already knew it which would just be a bummer for everyone involved so forget that. Use the comments to tell me why you should get the tickets, I’ll pick two people who either convince me or at random if everyone has lame reasons. I’m not setting a deadline either, but since this is happening Thursday night I’ll probably pick them soon so don’t sit around trying to think of something super crafty to write and then miss out. Go!

(event flyer is after the jump) Read the rest of this entry →

The Cirque du Soleil may be in Santa Monica, but tomorrow (Sunday, October 25), another circus comes to town.  The Tea Party Express protesters (who are often referred to, with or without irony, as the “teabaggers”) arrive in Los Angeles tomorrow to hold a protest in Griffith Park.  They promise to bring along their Lipton tea bags, stars & stripes clothing, and badly misspelled signs.  What are they protesting?  You can ask, but don’t expect a coherent answer.  Instead, you can come and join the counter-protest organized by the Courage Campaign, RENWL, and the Southern Christian Leadership Conference.

The tea party protest takes place at 4:30 p.m. at the Pad D – Crystal Springs picnic area in the park (the address listed is simply the park’s main address, 4730 Crystal Springs Road), and the counter-protest gathers at the same location at 4 p.m. for a preemptive rally.  Whatever side you’re on, this promises to be quite the entertaining event.