The theater is in the back of Meltdown so the first thing I did was put my head down and stare directly at my shoes as I made my way to the back to avoid any impulse buys before I even got to the show. I’m terrible in comics shops and never make it out without my bag being heavier and my wallet extremely lighter. The theater also doubles as an art gallery which is nice since it gives you something to do when you get there too early and desperately don’t want to step foot in the store and spend all your lunch money for the week.

I do have a few complaints about the theater but not many. The damn bathroom door wouldn’t close which some twat had to figure out in the middle of the show by repeatedly slamming the door which was partly the theaters fault for having such a shitty door and the twats fault for being so twatty. There was also no AC or fans which made it a bit too hot. PRO-TIP: Sitting by the door in the back definitely helps. Lastly the chairs were really crappy and after sitting in them for 2 hours straight really put a hurting on the old ass parts. Definitely not enough to keep me from coming back but something they should really fix. Especially that bathroom door!

The podcast taping actually ran for 2 hours total and was a really good time. Besides Sandra and Jordan they were joined by comedian Dave Ross who is a seriously funny guy. You really have to check his stuff out. It was a sex podcast but sadly no one was having any so they just talked about it a lot. As far as podcast tapings go I was a little more sober than I usually am (I’ve only ever been to Diggnation tapings and you tend to never remember those) so it was pretty cool to actually remember the whole thing the next day ;-) The panel shared advice and funny as hell stories that I definitely encourage you to check out. The mix of humor along with the sex and relationship talk make for a great combo. All in all it was a great time and cheaper than a movie. You can check out the episode here and the NerdMelt calendar here. Go grab some tickets and catch a show!

The cover of the LA Times yesterday featured a story about Ruben Pardo, the elevator operator at the building I work in at 5514 Wilshire Blvd. Ruben is one of the coolest cats in town and is always in a good mood despite being in an elevator for 35 years. Check out the video and accompanying story. And yes, that’s me carrying the case of Corona…

Photo by Mel Melcon

I can’t think of a better day to talk about this next blog than a rainy day in Los Angeles. I just drove back from the gym which is less than a mile from my house, and in that single span I saw more 4 wheeled dumb-assery than a Target parking lot in the Valley on a Saturday. Which, by the way, I personally believe is the single most dangerous place to walk in all of Los Angeles. Compton ain’t shit when you have a horde of trophy wives in Escalades on Blackberry’s meandering blindly in search of two parking spots they can sprawl their Bimbo Boxes in showing the world just how much they don’t give a fuck about their fellow human beings. Now that I have that off my chest…

I was doing research a few months back while I considered starting my own ‘Bad LA Driver’s Blog’. “The Devil’s Taint”, which is what I affectionately call the 405, was going to be a masterpiece of snark, wit and plain old trash talking. Then I found L.A. Can’t Drive… My hopes were dashed! The site was everything I wanted. Replete with photos, hilarious stories and not just an Idiocy Meter™ but an Asshole Meter™ as well. So I gave up my dreams and added L.A. Can’t Drive to my newsreader and haven’t looked back.

The founder of the site, a bloke naked Mike was kind enough to do a quick interview with me about the site, driving and other fun stuff. Enjoy and check out the site. He does take submissions from the public so if you’ve got any doozey’s send them his way. Just check L.A. Can’t Drive for details.

J: First off I love your site. As a 10yr+ LA driver I see this stuff every day and I’m glad you’re there to chronicle the gems. How did you get started with the site? Was there one particular incident in particular that spurred you into action?

M: The website has always been and always will be a medium for me to vent freely about my frustrations with asinine, assholish, and quite frankly retarded–yeah, I said it, you overly PC fake-as-hell bitches–L.A. driving. All kidding aside, when I moved to L.A. in 2006, I found myself succumbing to road rage, which when coupled with my sciatic issues from sitting in traffic all day, made me a pretty irate commuter. As a born and bred New Yorker, adjusting to the culture and lifestyle of Southern California is hard enough without having to deal with sucky drivers. And believe me, the irony has not been lost on me that a Chinese (albeit Asian American) male from New York City is writing about bad driving. Contrary to what some detractors may say, I have never claimed to be a perfect driver, nor do I drive like I’m chauffeuring Miss Daisy. And I certainly don’t drive around like a citizen cop trying to find bad driving for my blog. I needed a cathartic release from my daily frustrations, and being a creative person at heart, I thought that writing about my anger and letting it go in the webosphere was healthier than acting it out behind the wheel and screaming epithets at other drivers. There wasn’t one particular incident that made me decide to finally start making a running commentary on L.A. driving, though I must say that the plethora of drivers cruising around at night without their headlights on blew my mind from day one. And I’m not talking about dusk either…owls are hunting and roaches are having bonfires, and yet a disturbing percentage of L.A. drivers still have no idea that their headlights are off. To this day, I still don’t understand it, and it’s unlike anything I’ve ever seen in any other city I’ve lived in or visited.

J: How are your stories generally received? Is the audience generally receptive or combative? Driving seems like such a sore spot for LA locals. Everyone says everyone else is a terrible driver but themselves it seems.

M: The general feedback has been quite positive. I do get comments from people who jump to conclusions about my motivations or a perceived hypocritical moral soapbox, but that’s to be expected. After all, I make gross generalizations and assumptions all the time. I’m not so naive as to believe that bad driving doesn’t exist everywhere, because it does. But the fact remains that I live here, and we Angelenos spend more hours of our day driving than any other resident of the United States. As a result, driving is inextricably linked with one’s ego in Los Angeles, and it’s so easy to take bad driving encounters personally. With that said, I find it easier to just let things go if I write about it and commiserate with my readers. I guess it’s like commuter’s therapy, in a way. Most people tend to feel the same way I do, and it’s actually surprised me how quickly the site grew in popularity, when essentially it started as a public rant on a very simple platform. True, someone’s idiot is that other person’s asshole, but on a blog where all submissions are anonymous, who cares if you’re arguing both sides of the issue? If it makes you feel better to get it off your chest, then I say more power to you. I always welcome submissions and commuter horror stories from anyone, with or without photos or videos, and in many ways a community of us can talk about an age-old problem in a refreshing light. I have yet to receive a coherent, well-crafted email from someone who can justify aggressive driving in Southern California. Most of the time, I’ll get some undereducated product of the LAUSD who insults my mother and my manhood with poor grammar and spelling errors. I am waiting for the day when someone submits a photo of my car complaining about how I drive. That would be the epitome of this site’s success, in my book.

J: Has anyone you’ve posted about ever gotten in touch with you to refute the story or ask you to remove posts?

M: Actually, this has happened once with a commercial vehicle. I don’t blur out any identifying information for commercial vehicles, because if an employee is representing your business in a poor light because he or she is driving like a complete dick, then I would assume that you as the employer would want to do something about that. In this particular case, the person driving the vehicle was the owner of the business, and quite a few of my readers called the number plastered on his car to give him a piece of their mind. He came on the site and started to defend his behavior, basically denying everything that was being written. In the end, it was his word against mine, but one would have to ask why I would even bother making all this stuff up in the first place. Anyway, he couldn’t refute one thing that was actually shown, which was a photo of him crossing over double yellow lines in order to impatiently bypass traffic. Of course everything is hearsay, and no one to my knowledge who has participated on this site is a sworn officer of the law. As a result, no one can get a citation for something documented on my site. I think this guy was more concerned with his pride if anything else. And I was like, buddy, you were caught. Deal with it. Learn from it and move on or continue being a stubborn jackass. I suppose he chose the latter.

J: Have you found any specific part of the city that’s worse than any others or do different parts have different nuances?

M: I find that parts of the city where there is a lot of pedestrian traffic tend to have more attentive drivers. I also feel that driving in the Valley isn’t as bad as driving in L.A. itself, even taking Glendale into consideration, though this might have to do with general traffic congestion and the average size of the roads in question. From my own eyes, I would have to say that driving is pretty horrific from Downtown L.A. to West L.A. That cross-section covers all socio-economic and ethnic backgrounds, so I do not subscribe to the fact that certain races or genders or classes of people are worse drivers than others. However, I will occasionally joke about a fellow “Asian brother from another mother” who is just reinforcing a negative stereotype by driving like he’s in a third world country. Then again, maybe he could do my bookkeeping….he should be good with numbers, right?

J: Some people might say that taking photos of other cars while your driving makes you just as bad as they are? How do you respond to that and how do you take the photos? Do you have a special camera rig in your car or do you just say fuck it and whip out the camera phone?

M: Most of the time, I’m either a passenger in a car, someone else is taking the photo for me in the car, or I’m stopped in traffic. Other times, I just literally pick up my phone, point it in the general direction of the offender, and snap the photo. This was easier to do when I didn’t have a smart phone. My old Samsung flip-phone was perfect for taking quick pictures without a lot of button pressing, zooming, and the like. As a result, most of these latter pictures don’t come out. It’s not like I’m driving around with my knees with my hands on my phone and my eyes on the screen rather than on the road in an attempt to frame the perfect shot. If I can work with a photo I’ve shot, I will then do the cropping, rotating, and blurring with an image editor at home. I’ve actually developed the habit of carrying a camera with me with me which allows me to snap photos quickly, and then I call home via my car’s Bluetooth and leave a message on my answering machine about what I just witnessed. I did toy with having a Flip camera taped to my windshield, but then I thought that was a bit too elaborate. It’s not like i have a lot of time in my day to edit through hours of footage. In short, I’m always careful about what I do, and my modest driving record proves it. Sure, it only takes one wrong move to cause an accident, but I could say that about anything all drivers do while driving. For instance, I spend less time snapping a photo than it takes for people to drink a sip of water from a bottle or to browse the stations on their radio. It’s still legal to dial a number in your phone, though you need to chat with a hands-free device, and it certainly takes me less time to snap a photo than punch in 10 digits and hit send. And I must argue that I am in no way as unsafe as those drivers texting away with their eyes off the road for seconds at a time. Without exaggeration, I see a half dozen or more of these examples every single day.

J: If there’s one thing you could change about how LA drivers behave what would it be?

M: L.A. is the capital of distracted drivers. We seriously have people doing anything and everything but driving in this town. However, I think the primary issue is the lack of communication between L.A. drivers, or L.A. strangers for that matter. We are so isolated in our homes, places of school or work, and our cars that we almost forget how to interact with random people in our community. We need to stop treating other drivers on the road as obstacles to our destinations, and we need to start viewing them as fellow commuters who are just as frustrated with the poor roads and traffic congestion as we are. There is a pervasive me-first, cutthroat mentality that may or may not have to do with the veil of Hollywood that blankets this town, that inevitably affects how we drive. If we all start working together to deal with our common enemy known as the 1 hour/5 mile commute, than maybe we can start paring back on poor driving decisions that often contribute to the problem of congestion through bottlenecks and traffic accidents. And saying excuse me in a crowded Trader Joe’s shopping aisle wouldn’t hurt either. Don’t worry, we won’t bite.

Crazy tree fire outside my Hollywood apartment

To increase awareness of our services, the Los Angeles Fire Department designates the second Saturday of May as Fire Service Recognition Day. This year, the focus is on Emergency Preparedness:
“Your Safety is Our Mission”
Neighborhood Firefighters are using this year’s Open House as a timely opportunity to help you be prepared for disaster.

They encourage your to bring your cameras although no word on if you can shoot your own calendar while visiting. All the stations are open to the public but the stations below will have something a little more special planned with demonstrations and enhanced displays.

• Fire Station 88 5101 North Sepulveda Blvd Sherman Oaks
• Ports O’Call Village San Pedro
• Fire Station 86 4305 Vineland Ave Studio City *Pancake Breakfast from 8:00AM to Noon
• Fire Station 56 2759 Rowena Ave Silver Lake
• Fire Station 27 & adjacent LAFD Museum 1327 North Cole Ave Hollywood *Pancake Breakfast from 8:30AM to 1:00PM
• Fire Station 34 3661 7th Ave Jefferson Park
• Fire Station 69 15045 Sunset Blvd Pacific Palisades
• Fire Station 65 1525 East 103rd St Watts

If you can’t make it on Saturday there are a few Stations that will be open on Sunday, May 15, 2011 from 10:00 AM to 4:00 PM.

• Fire Station 102 13200 Burbank Blvd Valley Glen
• Fire Station 58 1556 South Robertson Blvd Pico/Robertson
• Fire Station 61 5821 West 3rd St Fairfax District

If you’ve ever driven over Topanga Canyon you have probably seen this little guy. He’s the mascot of Topanga Hauling. Don’t really get it myself but it takes all sorts. That little pig always puts a smile on my face though when I’m driving home.

This is the view of the San Fernando Valley from the top of Topanga Canyon a few minutes ago. I’ve driven Topanga Cyn hundreds of times and not once have I ever stopped at the overlook so today I thought I’d just take the time and take in the valley. I had no idea there were benches and a parking lot up there. There’s also badgers and mountain lions and a couple that was scurrying off into the brush for a frolic. I didn’t stick around for that though. It’s a very cool spot and I’m glad I finally took the time to stop. Apparently it’s also a good place to go get stoned according to Google.

I’m including a list of local eateries who still serve this shit along with their phone numbers if you’d like to call and demand they stop serving it. Sadly one of my favorite restaurants is on this list and I won’t be going back until it’s off the menu. So long China Garden in Woodland Hills, it was fun while it lasted.

Café Sierra
Hilton Los Angeles/Universal City
555 Universal Hollywood Drive
Universal City, CA 91608-1001
(818) 506-2500

Capital Seafood and Capital BBQ and Dim Sum Express
2700 Alton Parkway, Suite 127
Irvine, CA 92606
(949) 252-8188

CBS Seafood Restaurant
700 N Spring St
Los Angeles, CA 90012
(213) 617-2323

China Garden Restaurant
21618 Ventura Blvd.
Woodland Hills, CA 91364
(818) 347-0100

China Gate Chinese Restaurant
979 Dewey Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90006
(213) 384-1119

China Tea House
4 Sepulveda Blvd
Torrance, CA 90505
(310) 325-6716

Dragon
966 S Vermont Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90006
(213) 387-8833

Elite Restaurant
700 S Atlantic Blvd
Monterey Park, CA 91754
(626) 282-9998

Empress Pavilion Restaurant
988 N Hill St # 201
Los Angeles, CA 90012
(213) 617-9898

Full House Seafood Restaurant
963 N Hill St
Los Angeles, CA 90012
(213) 617-8382

Furiwa Seafood Restaurant
13826 Brookhurst St
Garden Grove, CA 92843
(714) 534-3996

Fu-Shing Chinese Restaurant
2960 E Colorado Blvd
Pasadena, CA 91107
(626) 792-8898

Golden City Restaurant
960 N Hill St
Los Angeles, CA 90012
(213) 253-2660

Golden Palace
6411 Lankershim Blvd
North Hollywood, CA 91606
(818) 766-6508

Golden Pheasant
1077 W Carson St
Torrance, CA 90502
(310) 320-1038

Golden Soup Restaurant
1039 E. Valley Blvd. #201
San Gabriel, CA 91776
(626) 312-9586

Hop Li
11901 Santa Monica Blvd #102
Los Angeles, CA 90025
(310) 268-2463

Hop Li Seafood Restaurant
526 Alpine St
Los Angeles, CA 90012
(213) 680-3939

Hop Li Seafood Restaurant
10974 W. Pico Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90064
(310) 441-3708

Hop Woo Barbeque Restaurant
845 N Broadway
Los Angeles, CA 90012
(213) 617-3038

Hop Woo Barbeque Restaurant
1 W Main St
Alhambra, CA 91801
(626) 289-7938

Jin
74 W 8th St
Los Angeles, CA 90005
(213) 386-8976

JR Seafood Restaurant
11901 Santa Monica Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90025
(310) 268-2463

Lai Lai Chinese Restaurant
3377 Wilshire Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90010-1850
(213) 387-2070

Mandarin West
At the Westin Bonaventure Hotel
404 S Figueroa St
Los Angeles, CA 90071
(213) 683-8866

Mandarin Tiger
18900 Ventura Blvd
Tarzana, CA 91356
(818) 345-0151

Mission 261
261 S Mission Dr
San Gabriel, CA 91776
(626) 588-1666

Moo’s
4817 Torrance Blvd
Torrance, CA 90503
(310) 542-5270

NBC Seafood Restaurant
404 S Atlantic Blvd
Monterey Park, CA 91754
(626) 282-2323

Ocean Seafood
747 N Broadway
Los Angeles, CA 90012
(213) 687-3088

PCH Chinese Restaurant
1841 Pacific Coast Hwy
Lomita, CA 90717
(310) 326-5640

Plum Tree Inn
937 N Hill St
Los Angeles, CA 90012
(213) 613-1819

Prince Seafood
11828 South Street
Cerritos, CA 90703
(562) 809-1812
E-mail: davey@princeseafood.com

Regent Seafood Restaurant
747 N Main St
Los Angeles, CA 90012
(213) 680-3333

Sam Woo Restaurant
15333 Culver Drive Ste 720
Irvine, CA 92604
(949) 262-0688

Sea Empress Seafood
1636 W Redondo Beach Blvd
Gardena, CA 90247
(310) 538-6868

Sea Harbour
3939 Rosemead Blvd.
Rosemead, CA 91770-1951
(626) 288-3939

Seafood Paradise Restaurant
8602 Westminster Blvd.
Westminster, CA 92683
(714) 893-6066

Seashore
5137 Calle Mayor
Torrance, CA 90505
(310) 373-0751

Shin Peking Chinese Cuisine
3101 W Olympic Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90006
(213) 381-3003

Spring Garden Restaurant
187 N Sierra Madre Blvd
Pasadena, CA
(626) 796-2531

Sun’s
6441 N Figueroa St
Los Angeles, CA 90042
(323) 258-1929

Szechwan Chinese
2107 Pacific Coast Hwy
Lomita, CA 90717
(310) 534-2280

Ten Ten Seafood Restaurant
669 N. Euclid Street
Anaheim, CA 92018
(714) 991-8412

Vip Harbor
11701 Wilshire Blvd #16
Los Angeles, CA 90025
(310) 979-3377

VIP Chinese Restaurant
705 1/2 S Western Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90005
(213) 389-8532

Young King
3100 W Olympic Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90006
(213) 487-6154

Entire list of US restaurants
Entire list of Canadian restaurants

Hat tip to Tim Ferriss.

Like I said it was Happy Hour so we dug into the free noshables and ordered the GIANT appetizer sampler platter while we downed our cabernets and margaritas. There were just 3 of us total and it completely filled us all up to stuffing. OMG, the coconut shrimp were AMAZING! After a few glasses of wine my friend went over and chatted up an old guy at the “Pilot’s Only” table, which turns out actually is for pilots only. The staff was great and the vibe was chill. Before we left our waitress told me to go check out the banquet room which was made up like a blown out house overlooking the back patio where a band was just getting settled in for a long night of cover tunes. I’ll be going back there quite a bit I for-see. Definitely a hidden gem in the valley.

So, I’m watching Mythbuster’s or maybe it was RuPauls Drag Race, I can’t remember, but this ad comes on for this new airport shuttle service to LAX called Shuttle 2 LAX. They service the entire LA area for $20 for the first rider and $11 for each additional. I thought it had to be a sham, because most of the shuttles from my BFE part of town (Woodland Hills) are close to $80. That’s what a town car cost me from Hollywood for crissakes! I usually end up driving to the airport and parking for a week because after you factor in the round-trip it’s still cheaper. BTW, cheapairportparking.org is a rockstar and I usually leave my car at the Hilton and it’s great. But I digress… I’ve asked around and I can’t find anyone who’s used them so I ask you, our dear readers… is it the new found must have in our LAX arsenals or is this too good to be true? And while this may look like a giant cheap ad for them I’ve honestly never used the service and need feedback. My Grandmother in Chicago is very sick so I’m looking to get my ducks in a row for solid airport transport. Thanks and hit me in the comments.