I’ve been single, married, in a relationship and experienced just about every combination in between. So I’m aware that meeting someone who turns you into a ‘hunka-hunka burning love’ can sometimes be an exercise in futility! But lately, lots of my male friends here in LA have been moaning and groaning that it’s impossible to meet a nice, smart, cool and okay, yes, we’re talking men, so she has to be a sexy-hot woman, here in LA.
Not true! This place is teeming with available women! So in my humble ode to public service this week, I’m gonna share some tips on getting to know the single ladies of our luscious Los Angeles. And just so you know, I polled a bunch of single women for their suggestions, so it’s not just my clues.
First, the thing I heard a lot from my girlfriends is that part of the problem is that men who seem attracted to you don’t initiate. If you see her, go talk to her. Believe me, you will eventually hit the jackpot. Women like attention. So if there is a flicker, go make contact! It’s how my honey Dan lassoed me in. (That and his dazzling smile).
Yes, you will be rejected a lot…. not necessarily because she doesn’t like you; she might be married, in a relationship, recovering from losing a parent, who knows! But if she’s free and has that tingle too… It could be magic!
#2: Go to a yoga class! Every single yoga class I’ve every taken, the ratio of women to men is at least 3 to 1. Sometimes there are no men there at all, so you will be the only guy in a room of 30 women. And most women who take yoga have decent (if not awesome) bodies, have some sense of spirituality and are open to new experiences. All pluses as far as relationships go.
#2: Hit the Dog Park. Even if you don’t have a dog, you will make a friend. For some reason, whenever I take my canine out for a run, there’s tons of really groovy women (and men too!) at the park. And they are talking up a storm, playing with their mutts, generally in a great mood. Must be all that sunshine, fresh air and playful energy.
#4: Weekend Festivals & Workshops: I go to a lot of music festivals, yoga workshops, art stuff…. and invariably one of Dan the Man’s single friends who hangs with us, ends up meeting a neat girl. Seriously. At Bhaktifest a couple of weeks ago, I had some friends, both whom I knew from different worlds, meet. They ended up really liking each other. Voila. Love is born!
Another time at Lightning in a Bottle, (coming up this weekend!) a good friend met a girl and they ended up living together!
#5: At a sushi bar… or any restaurant bar.
My sweetie and I love “The Hungry Cat”. We always eat at the bar and we invariably meet someone pretty interesting! The last two times we met single women. One was eating alone before she met her friends for a night on the town. The other time, we met two women loading up before a night of partying. They were all gorgeous and smart. And most importantly, single and looking!
#6: Get your ass out to every dinner party, event, etc that you are invited to. Seriously. If you are hanging with the people you relate to best, they have friends! Let them know you are looking. Although most of them already will… the desire to match-make is almost instinctual.
#7: Yup. Online Dating. I know, I know. It can be dreadful. But two couples I know who are happily married met on the internet in LA. The great thing about online dating is that you meet people you would NEVER meet in your own circle! The worst thing about online dating is that you meet people you would NEVER meet in your own circle! That said, when I was trying it, I looked at it as an adventure in social expansion. My advice is to talk several times on the phone first… if there is chemistry, it will come out. If you feel nothing and you meet them anyway, just to try and second guess yourself…. it will be ugly! Online, you’ll definitely have some crazy adventures. I have some of my best dating stories (including one with a guy who had a full blown dungeon! Stop! You don’t want to know…) from online dating.
So Happy Hunting! And if you have your own suggestions: Please! Chime in!