Ha ha! The rooster at my dad’s house crowed the beginning of the theme to The Odd Couple. I always found it unsatisfying that he never finished the stanza before starting over again.

For my older two part of their kindergarten science project was to hatch eggs. All sorts of eggs were bought and the kritters were hatched in Mrs. Creeds class. Come spring break the various critters needed a home. I dodged that bullet with my daughter…our youngest was just born and might get sick.

My oldest son convinced me he was ready for a pet and I agreed to let him have a chick. I signed off the note. My daughter ever the jealous and devious one convinced Mrs Creed she was to have one and I made a mistake on the note. I picked them up at their afterschool program to find I was not giving a home to 2 chickens.

Things went well, they got bigger, and bigger and bigger. Eventually they would get out on their own. Very frustrating.

One Day my oldest decided they needed to go for a walk. She made nooses out of yarn and had enough extra for leashes. I’m in the house changing the youngest and I hear this racket and her screaming.

I get outside and they are trying to walk the chickens. My middle son has a chicken that is trying to hide under a bush. Everytime it tried to leave he’d yank it hard back out from under the bush. Everytime he did that she screamed “Quit choking your chicken on the drive way”.

All the neighbors were out in no time flat. It was funny and embarrassing. My friends at work reminded me that chickens are the ultimate white trash accessory.

Lucky me a coyote or two got rid of them for me on sunday morning.

My mom’s friends up in Visalia had all kinds of food fowl at their home. But they had this one chicken that was convinced it was a duck. When the ducks would get into the pond, she would try to get into, start drowning then wade out and pace along the end of the pond cackling at them. When they flew, she’d try to too and alway wind up flying into the fence or clothesline. When they went away she’d sit in the yard keening for them and had a happy dance when they’d come back. The oldest son hated that chicken and whenever she’d make noises, he’d say, “Man, I can’t wait until eat that bird.”