So you’ve got that festive holiday party to go to this weekend. Maybe it’s a casual pot luck, maybe it more formal. There might be a polite-but-firm standing “no gifts” order from the hosts, but damn that protocol because typically when I’m invited into someone’s home to enjoy their company and hospitality I usually like to show up with a little something that says “hey thanks for having us over.”
Trouble is more than likely that leaves me fashionably late plus ten minutes spent playing the eenie-meenie game in the Trader Joe’s wine aisle trying to pick out a bottle that makes it look as if Im some sort of knowledgeable about wine, which I am not, while also trying not to look like a cheap bastard, which I am.
There is a better way: Broguiere’s Egg Nog. This is not just any egg nog, folks. Heull “how about that” Howser himself calls it “amazing!” Never mind that calls everything amazing, this stuff really is. It’s the decadent champagne supernova of nogs, hand-crafted by a privately owned dairy based local right here in Montebello (so private and old-fashioned they still have no website). Their nog is served up in the type of bygone-era thick glass bottles the likes of which your grandmomma probably once had delivered by a practically extinct species of SoCal hominid known as the milk man (H. lactis).
The only trouble right about now is finding a store whose stock at such a late date isn’t severely depleted. Demand might outpace supply wherever you’re at, but so far in my part of the city the Sunset & Virgil Vons has been maintaining a good inventory, and I believe they charge somewhere around $6.39 a bottle (which includes a $1.15 deposit, providing distinct encouragement for the purchaser or recipient to return it to the store for a refund). Trust me on this, unless the person whom you bestow this remarkable elixer upon is lactose intolerant or had some sort of bad eggnog incident in their youth, they will remember the day you came bearing Broguiere’s long after it’s gone. Which won’t take long at all.