So, I decided about an hour or so ago to walk down to the local Subway to eat my lunch/breakfast. (Don’t judge me.) I’m sitting there with my Spinach and Chicken salad when this guy walks in. He’s a tall guy, kind of clean-cut and athletic (*cough* jock *cough*) looking…but he’s wearing this….shirt.

It’s worn thin and I can read the words, “Punk Rocker Found Dead in East Village” stenciled on it, as well as a what looks like a picture of GG Allin. Now, I don’t want to jump to conclusions, just ’cause he looks like a jock, I don’t know, hell, sometimes I wear a suit, he might not be a douche-bag. Who knows?

So I ask: “Is that a GG Allin shirt?

Blank look. “No.”

Well, now I can see it better, it is definitely a stencil of GG’s face, off of the Hated album, bandana, sunglasses, and mustache with the center shaved out.

“That’s not a GG Allin t-shirt?”

“No.” I stare. he looks uncomfortable. “No I don’t think so.” My eyebrow goes up. “I don’t know.”

“Oh.”

It’s hard to really imply tone on the internet sometimes; suffice it to say, my final response, “Oh,” encompassed, without doubt, the implication that he was a clueless idiot. Which he was.

Now look, you can say whatever you like about GG Allin. He was a scumbag, no doubt. But that’s just the point: does anyone go around wearing a shirt bearing a picture and/or phrase without knowing exactly what they are adorning their body with? Anyone besides a clueless douche bag, that is?

For fucks sakes, if you are going to wear a GG Allin T-shirt you should know who the fuck GG Allin is. And what’s more, one should always be aware of what is on one’s clothing, in case it happens to be GG Allin or something else, the vileness of which you may not be prepared to sport.

Are you just trying to look cool, showing that the words “Punk Rock” are on your shirt? Or was it the “East Village” tie-in, that “I’m too hip for L.A.,” bullshit.

You obviously don’t know shit about Punk Rock, and I bet your only link to NYC was a trip there with your Frat brothers. Douche Bag.

Now, I could wear that shirt, and I would, but I know who GG is, and I’d be prepared to admit and revel in what a completely disgusting human being he was. And what a great song “Sluts in the City” is.

Jock boy in the Subway, however, is a douche bag.

Be warned, all of you, your douche-baggery, Clothing related or otherwise, if witnessed, may be blogged.

A Clue: Don’t leave home without it.

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