Parking ‘tard named “richard”

ptard1.jpg Amazing. A bit of background, my street is very old and very narrow. It can accomodate safely only 1 parking lane. By statute and municipal code there is no parking on the east side of the street as that east lane is for northbound traffic.

Today coming home from an errand I had to hit the brakes as he was blocking the driving lane and there was traffic on the southbound side that I had to yield to.

This parking tard has a habit of parking wherever, whenever he wants. Today I got to meet him and after brief introduction I learned his name is “Richard”.

I had just snapped this trusty picture and routed it to a variety of sources, including when he approached. I introduced myself and thing went down like this…

Richard….you have a problem with my truck?
Fraz…Hi…I’m frazgo a writer with and noticed you were illegally parked
Richard…so what I was there for only a little while
Fraz…ok, but you do know that there is no parking ever on the east side as that is the north bound driving lane
Richard…so what there’s never any traffic on this street
Fraz…actually there was I had to stop for southbound traffic as you were illegally blocking the north bound lanes
Richard…so what, you would have had to have waited anyway
Fraz…actually I wouldn’t have, but do you see the “no parking” sign here 20 feet in front of you and 50 feet behind?
Richard….so what they were mowing across the street and I needed to move my truck so I wouldn’t get grass on it, um so I wouldn’t be in their way
Fraz…so you see no problems with breaking the law and creating a traffic hazard?
Richard…so what, I’m moving in a few days.

I left as it was obvious he saw nothing wrong with breaking the law and creating a traffic hazard. Of course the obvious question begs to be asked…why didn’t he park that beast in his driveway and assigned parking space at the apartment complex he lives in. Didn’t get that far into the conversation as it was obvious a kumquat had more intelligence

16 thoughts on “Parking ‘tard named “richard””

  1. Thanks for the link to youparklikeanasshole. Love it. I have developed a minor obsession with and the parking site complements it nicely.

  2. thanks for the link as well to for those rare moments where testosterone isn’t an issue

  3. My husband asked me if I would ever consider posting a “parking tard” story on and I said “where do you think we heard about it in the first place?!” He was so pleased.

    Great story and ditto on the thanks for the parklikeanasshole site…!!

  4. i don’t want to defend the a-hole in question, but…

    there is always a but.

    i live on a cul-de-sac and as we all know who ever lives on one for any amount of time thinks they own it. well i parked on the wrong side of the street to go back into my house and retrieve some paperwork. a quick trip. the next thing i know i see som PARKING NAZI come out and chastise me for breaking a PARKING LAW. not ruining her yard or impedeing on her rights or her pursuit of happiness. the next thing you know her and other neighbors are up and willing to fight over theses laws that they feel they need to enforce.

    my advice is don’t be as big a dick as the other guy and just let karma give the evil doer a ticket. bullshit parking vigilante shit is never cool and will always end up with the same conversation above.

    lets all face it parking laws suck.

  5. Deryke, fuck karma.

    I get the impression this wasn’t a one-time thing – if he’s doing it over and over, he’s a inconsiderate asshole. There was nothing “vigilante” here – just a discussion with a repeat offender.

    More often than not, parking laws do NOT suck – they’re there for a reason. Someone sounds like they’ve been approached more than once…

  6. if it makes you feel any better, i’m convinced there is a direct, inverse relationship between truck size and junk size. he may have been punished enough as it is. :)

  7. Frazgo, If I lived in a perfect world, my Honda would be equipped with a rocket launcher for all parking fucktards and jackholes like cowboy dick. BTW –I remember a certain summer vacation in Palm Springs when you went to the valet and demanded that they park your car in the shade gratis as the mall management was hoarding the shade for profit! I simply stuck my bloated gut as far out as possible and parked in “the expectant mother” parking- and pretended not to know you.

  8. Wow. Another Parking post. A-N-O-T-H-E-R P-A-R-K-I-N-G P-O-S-T. How original.

    I just want to ask: How does your picture or you relating your encounter with this guy enhance my enjoyment of Los Angeles, or enlighten me about something worthwhile.

    Can we have a break from “Look at this DICK parking” posts?

  9. Well, Fraz, consider yourself Officially One Of US now – people are complaining that your posts don’t belong here!

  10. I had to lmao on this one,”enhance my enjoyment of Los Angeles, or enlighten me”…indeed! If it happens and amuses or annoys someone I’ll do it.

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