Ain’t no Mystery about this date

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[yes, it’s an actual photo]

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[unfortunately, so’s this]

Ladies, if you’re single and ready to mingle, might I recommend you check out this fine eBay auction?

Yessirree, this is a serious auction for a date with one of LA’s most eligible bachelors, Tommy “Tater” Wilson, made ultra-famous by his death-defying feats on behalf of the Fast Ashleys for their MTV extravaganza.

The winning bidder will go on a romantic evening of food, good conversation and possibly the LA gun club.

The auction describes Tater as “A hopeless romantic all wrapped up like a big teddy bear,” and certainly that he is.

Stats: 6’3″
225 lbs
Caucasian
Tattooed
Well groomed (un-like Todd)
34 years young
Loves to be held by women
No kids and never been married

The Rules:

1. Date will take place in the Metro Los Angeles area.

2. You must be willing to come to LA if not local.

3. Tater is willing to fly to your location – all expenses paid by winning bidder.

4. Dudes- We can hang out and go to a car show, but NO TOUCHING!

5. Winning bidder must be 18 years of age or older.

I’d go for it myself but I’m already all Tater’d up. So enjoy!

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4 Replies to “Ain’t no Mystery about this date”

  1. “The winning bidder will go on a romantic evening of food, good conversation and possibly the LA gun club.”

    Crap, maybe Sean should enter!

  2. It’s totally open to dudes – but please see Rule #4.

    And I want to go with Markland on the Dickinson lunch!

  3. Actually, this sounds like an evening of shameless kickass nonironic fun. Yay for post-postmodernism!

    [I will not be bidding, but still! The LA Gun Club! How cool is THAT?!?]

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