“No, I’ve been nervous lots of times.”


The Los Angeles World Airports organization (LAWA) has issued a media advisory (aka press release) about the upcoming summer travel season, starting this Memorial Day weekend: “[LAWA] officials are forecasting this summer’s travel season from Memorial Day through Labor Day to be the busiest since the record-breaking summer of 2001 for both Los Angeles International (LAX) and Ontario International (ONT) Airports.”

They’ll be holding a news conference tomorrow with “insider smart travel tips” that will undoubtedly include:

  • Getting to the airport three days early.
  • Not bringing dangerous items like guns, bombs, and babies.
  • And what songs to hum or whistle during the mandatory strip searches. (“Love For Tender” by Elvis Costello is apparently a popular request.)

Strangely enough, I have not been on a plane since August 2001, a couple of weeks before you know what, but it’s not for any particular reason — I haven’t gone far enough afield in the last few years that a car wasn’t preferable. Given the harried expressions on the faces of those I’ve picked up from the airport recently, I’m not too disappointed with missing out.

Anybody heading out of town this weekend? Me, I’m going to BBQ the hell out of something, occasionally glance up at the contrails streaking across a beautiful blue sky, and crank Get Happy!! on the stereo.

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