A Picture’s Worth A Thousand Pffffts

rainday.jpgMaybe I’m just too jaded by bigger cataclysms. No, definitely I’m just too jaded by bigger cataclysms. As such, the L.A. Times couldn’t have chosen a better photo to illustrate how pathetic and helpless we become when the rains hit town.

With the Red Cross estimating that perhaps as many as 100,000 people are dead from Sunday’s 9.0 quake and its resulting tsunamis that have devastated coastal areas around the Indian Ocean, I’m considering the life-and-death struggles the survivors face in the weeks ahead and I’m having just a wee bit of trouble mustering anything along the lines of compassion for the blubbering woman shown being rescued by two L.A. County firefighters from a flooded Vermont Avenue intersection. Why, one is even carrying her bags, while yet a third leans in to examine the S-Class Mercedes sedan she no doubt stalled out driving it blithely into the bumper-deep water.

Oh, the horror! Yet, is she crying because of how harrowing it is to walk through the knee-deep water or is she mourning the deaths of her drowned Manolo Blahniks?

27 Replies to “A Picture’s Worth A Thousand Pffffts”

  1. LOL. I can see her thinking: “Finally, here’s the opportunity to go ‘off road’ with this thing! This is why I got an SUV”

  2. You have to keep in mind that the value of her ruined dress could probably feed a southeast asian family for several months. So a minor flood here is the same as months of famine there.

  3. Holy crap. You guys are doing a great job of filling your smug, ass-hattery with a rich, creamy center of ignorance. Until we have proof that the aforementioned woman kills puppies or throws rocks at babies, it’s probably a little early to villify her for driving German cars and being terrified of a flood. That whore drives a Mercedes! What’s that bitch doing wearing a dress?! Please. If she were a small ethnic woman wearing crappy clothes and driving a crappy car would you be more sympathetic? She’s a person who you don’t know caught in a dangerous situation. Clue: the fire department shows up for dangersou situations, not minor inconveniences that require mockery. Explicitly obvious guilt from living in a fabulously wealthy country and some very lame self-righteousness have combined to make you guys spout insensitive nonsense. So this woman has enough money to buy a nice car and dress herself and we should get pissed off at her because nature kicked her ass? Floods are ridiculously powerful (shocker!) and dangerous and she could have been hurt or killed and being confronted with one’s own mortality makes most a little emotional. Why don’t you guys take a little bit of that guilt and apply it toward something constructive rather than hating on the traumatized.

  4. Ahhhhhh yes, from the land of anonymous chickenshit pissery comes the humorless “Annoyed” with a diahreal and paragraph-less defense for the obviously stricken, apparently affluent (and who says she’s not ethnic?) woman I had the dastardly gall to pillory in my post for wasting good taxpayer money by diverting fire department personnel from a REAL emergency by not having the backbone to bite the bullet and carry her own damn bags while she blubbers across to the dry side of a waterlogged street.

    Good grief, standing water from a backed up sewer drain is about as powerful (shocker!) and dangerous as the water in your bathtub. But why am I debating such imbecilia when what I really want to do is thank the high heavens there are such low-comprehension, irony-deficient jerkweeds like “Annoyed” WHO MISS THE FUCKING POINT and just snipe all vitriolic and shameful from the sidelines with sooooo much credibility behind fake email addresses and clichÈ nicknames. Because If nothing else all such thick-headed heavy-browed overblown keyboard vomit makes me do is so look forward to the next example upon which I can mock ó and guiltlessly, too.

    P.S. How was I to know it was your mom?

  5. seriously, Will, this is why b.la gets so little traffic– you turn up the snark to eleven, and when readers call you on it, you go ballistic on them.

    but wait, two articles above is sean posting pictures of the 110 being flooded. where’s your snarky comment to his article? that’s right, nowhere to be found.

    perhaps, will, you need a different outlet. one that doesn’t deal with people, because i don’t think you can handle them very well.

  6. Yes, how dare she be a middle-aged white woman rather than some hottie? She should be shot, right? Only the cute survive in Will’s universe.

  7. Holy cow. What has happened in the last month or so that the trolls and reactionaries have come out to play so much? It’s non-stop.

    I never thought I’d see the day when people are actually arguing that we shouldn’t be reassesing our priorites and concerns in light of the death of 100,000+ other people. I’m totally grossed out.

  8. “Marky” my cowardly freakwad! Where you been? Oh you of the “learn to fucking surf” smackdown from post’s past. It’s been a while, eh? The medication must’ve helped, but yeah I hate it when scrips run out. Good to have you back. I was almost missing you. Almost.

    And thanks for plugging my so unworhty website. I fully agree that Quicktime clip has got to be the lamest. I shot it with an otherwise awesome phonecam in otherwise dreadful conditions… and to top it off the river wasn’t even raging that much. Forgive me? Didn’t think so.

    Seriously, I know you just crave seeing me get my shorts all torqued up into a bunch ó and you’re very good at it, too. But I’m gonna forfeit the match this time. That’s right. You win ó mainly because I don’t have the time or blood-sugar level to explain in simple enough language that will allow you to understand why and how you just so totally BLOW.

    But insinuating I’m unable to snark upon myself? Puhlease. Do you see me deleting your comments? this isn’t LAist for corn’s sake! Hell no. Not only am I the first one in line to whack myself silly with the self-deprecating stick, but I can take shit from goontangs such as yourself as well. In fact, I dig these types of “exchanges.” I revel in them. Kind of like you at TJ Maxx sale.

    And come on now; blaming me for B.la’s so-called light traffic is desperate and off the mark too… especially when it’s cherished visitors like you that keep people coming back for their RDA of idiocy.

    In short, I don’t know which of the chorus of voices inside your head appointed you to the position of Chief Sassypants in charge of ridiculing and demeaning me, and frankly I couldn’t care less your motives or motivation, whoever the hell you are or aren’t. I’ll just keep giving you and all the other anonymites pieces of my mind for you to pick on and bitchslap anfd you keep the crap coming back. Fair enough? Just let’s try not to take things so personally, ‘K?

  9. And “Rachel,” Did I lamely missed the humor in your statement or do you indeed think I’m some sort of discriminatory sexist cheeseball?

    If it’s the former, hahahaha…ahem. But if it’s the latter, please let me attempt however unsuccessfully to assure you that the attractiveness, age, and gender of the person in the photo had nothing to do with the position I took.

  10. Will–easy to say, but you obviously have Mom issues. An older white woman is the easiest target on the planet. And that she dare have visible signs of income–well, that really must gall you. She couldn’t possibly have worked to earn the money for the car. You took a cheap shot and got smacked for it. Suck it up.

  11. Sorry “Rachel,” but easier for YOU to say. And now it’s mom issues is it? Didn’t miss the humor in that corny cheapshot, doc.

    An older woman is who the photographer took a picture of. Ahy do you ASSume she’s white? She could very well be Latino or Armenian or Middle Eastern none of which matters to me.

    Try this: See if you can scrape two unfrayed synapses together and comprehend that had it been a 30-year-old man playing the helpless tip I would have gone even farther off with what you categorize as a cheap shot.

    As to getting smacked for it. I’ve got no problem with taking what some may construe as an unpopular stand and subsequently hearing about it.

    So suck it up, you say? Already have and still am, but does that mean I should shut down and tolerate kneejerk reactionaries who gutlessly peck from not-found email addresses such as yours? Happy to disappoint.

  12. Right, Will–I’d really use a real email addy so you, with your proved hostility towards women, can stalk me, post an unflattering photo or maybe–beat me up. Maybe it’s not Mom trouble–maybe you just hate all women. You sure show it here.

  13. Seriously “Rachel,” you insult yourself to an almost sociopathic level to even entertain the notion that I’d waste any more time with you than I already have countering your vapid, transparent and flat-out weird attacks. Parrying your weak thrusts on a comments page is one thing, but when it comes to the real world I couldn’t care less about you.

    And anyway, no photo of you could be more unflattering than the image you’ve painted of yourself here. So if not for your own benefit than for the benefit of the dead horse you seem unable to quit kicking here in public, if you have any other stabs you want to take at me, get the hell out of here and go over to Yahoo or Hotmail and use whatever little imagination you have to set-up an email account with bogus information and then feel free to contact me directly through it.

  14. Don’t worry Will, some of us have the sense of humor to laugh out loud at your original post and gloriously sarcastic yet accurate description of that photo. I thought it was one of the most hysterically accurate things I’ve read in a long time. Especially in the light of the tsunami tragedy…which totally puts a “tragedy’ like this standing water rescuse in perspective. THREE firemen responded?? To help her hike through water that isn’t even up to her knee?

    But then again I also thought the adult guy on the little girl’s bike with the training wheels and the flat tire was also great…a very funny WTF observation you captured and shared while driving past a street corner. That’s the stuff that makes driving around this crazy city a little more interesting. Keep up the snark Will, some of us do appreciate it :)

  15. I think it’s pretty damned funny too. Coming from the backwoods of East Texas, where thunderstorms, tornadoes, and all kinds of ungodly weather and hillbillies abound, nothing makes me laugh as gleefully as seeing LA get waterlogged. Not only does it remind me of the fact that yes, LA does have actual weather sometimes, but all the fake glamor and snobbery gets washed right down the storm drains along with the relatively light rainfall.

    I was apprehensive of posting on here after seeing the spastic and overly defensive remarks that some people have shat from their self-righteous bowels and smeared all over the place, but then again it’s just the Internet. And to the “floods am teh dangerouse” remark…like Will said, these aren’t floods. The only thing that’s dangerous in these sorts of scenarios are morons who don’t know how to react in such a situation. You want dangerous floods, go somewhere in the southeast during storm season. Meanwhile, I’m going to reserve my ticket to Hell and keep on chuckling at the rich woman driven to hysterics by two/three feet of water.

    Keep ’em coming, Will, not ALL of us have to take pot-shots at someone for pointing out the shallowness(no pun intended) inherent to Los Angeles. Some people just need to freaking grow up and stop being so dramatic.

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