Shortly after writing about Rocky splattered all over our street, I ventured out again & as I was driving toward the freeway, I noticed people slowing down & pointing and staring to the left.
I shouldn’t have been a looky-loo driver because what I saw was a smashed (and I don’t mean one-too-many-cosmos-smashed) possum lying in the middle of the street with all its guts hanging out on the pavement.
Since I didn’t get and sympathy from Yoshi, I thought I’d call Mikey2, who was no better because he started saying stuff like, “Mmmmmmmmmm! Lunch!”
Forget Atkins, South Beach, Weight Watchers, or Jenny Craig. I think the Roadkill Diet is the way to go.
Whenever you get hungry, think of roadkill… of rodent guts, doused in blood and fur, freshly displayed on an asphalt (plate), garnished with a dash of tread. And if you’re lucky enough for it to be a wonderfully warm L.A. day, you get the extra treat of a critter slightly browned to a crisp.
Try it for yourself. I, for one, can vouch that this diet has been extremely effective for the past 12 hours. (Don’t forget to consult your doctor before beginning any new weight loss routine.)