Make Me Ralph

I haven’t set foot in Ralphs since all that chaos went down last year and haven’t missed it once. The other night I just needed a bottle of water and was at the video store right next to Ralphs on Glendale and figured what the hell. Strikes over, I only need one thing, how bad can it be? Well kids, it can be REAL bad. In the minute or so I was in there before I ran screaming (in my head at least) back out the door without my water I saw…

– The biggest dirty black spill mark on the floor I’ve ever seen my my life, the kind that takes 2 minutes to clean up and any other store would have fired people if it was there for more than 3.
– a knocked over display
– a sign for that display knocked over and laying on the floor between an isle.
– rotting, bruised fruit with mold growing on it
– employees walking right past all this stuff not even caring.
– the manager stepping over the sign laying in the middle of the isle and not even thinking of picking it up.
– screaming kids in diapers sitting on the floor next to a cart with no parents to be seen anywhere.
– only one register open and a line all the way through the store.
– tons of employees walking around with nothing to do.

Seriously this is all what I soaked in in the time it took me to walk in the front door, walk down the front row of isles, decide there was no fucking way I could be in there for another 10 second and turn around a leave. I felt like I needed to take a shower after walking out of there.

Needless to say, I drove a mile to Gelsons and was much happier with that decision.

4 Replies to “Make Me Ralph”

  1. If I want cheap groceries, I go to the Ralph’s over on San Fernando (just hop on the 2, it’s actually not much further), they have a much cleaner store and better produce.

    Then there’s the Von’s over on Sunset. I haven’t been in there since the strike was over and can’t speak about its present state though.

  2. I was forced to rely on the cold comfort of Gelson’s during the strike (one time a catty bagger actually questioned me in an incredulous tone why I would want paper instead of plastic: because fuck you, that’s why!), and I couldn’t wait to abandon that conceited chain. Since the strike’s end, I have been back on several occasions to that Vons over on Sunset and Virgil, and though some of the shelves are still sparcely populated and the enthusiasm and eagerness to assist that used to be prevalent is still somewhat missing, the aisles aren’t mystery stained and the fruit ain’t moldy.

  3. I hate, hate, hate that nasty-ass creepy Ralph’s. I’m a longtime Gelson’s shopper, and regardless of their insane prices (even though I currently have $3.71 in my checking account), I will continue to shop there. (I should hasten to add that I do not like cooking, so my grocery needs are pretty basic.)

    Why Gelson’s? Here’s a good example: I always order cold cuts and cheese from the deli counter, then come back to get them after I’m done shopping. One time, though, the woman at the deli counter FOUND ME IN THE STORE to give me my order. Just because.

    I still go across the street to TJs for produce, etc., since Gelson’s wants to charge $3 for a single avacado. Still, I’ve never had a bad experience at the fancy G.

    That bag business is bullshit, though.

  4. I’ve never seen a Gelson’s and I’ve lived in LA for 25 years. Okay gotta get outta da hood more often.

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